Choose introspection

Too much introspection, for many, can be more harmful than good. The lower case letters are that reminder for me.
So...I certainly didn't plan a two "cuppa" quiet time.
But God.....had me in a mental, physical and emotional"introspecting" state throughout the day.
But....in fact, it was a spiritual introspection with the other listed factors thrown in for clarity.

It all started this morning when reading my 2009 journal entry for January ninth. that date was the first time I had ever heard the word, biopsy, as it related to me. I had also written that Dr. Schneider said, "It doesn't look like cancer but that's where we start in order to rule it out." Boy, was he wrong! But God wasn't.

Even that day I had read in my devotional, My Utmost for His Highest, on "Intercessory Introspection" and from Psalm 139 that God knows when I sit and rise, what words I will say before I say them---for He is the one who created me. "All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

Throughout the day I did dwell on so-o-o-o many positives that were a result of my cancer and my roller coaster year of surgery upon surgery to rebuild my face. So many blessings---mainly because I knew that the Lord had answered the prayer I had prayed in 2009, "Lord, if it doesn't matter for eternity, I'd rather "it" not be cancer." How much easier it was to recall that prayer and know that the "CANCER" answer was His answer. God's best for me. It would count for eternity.

As today was winding down, God affirmed my introspection as I picked up a "new" gift. (which is a blog entry in and of itself) My gift, the devotional book, Savor LIVING ABUNDANTLY WHERE YOU ARE AS YOU ARE 's 1/9 entry spoke right to my heart.

"Blessings & Curses" and scripture citation, centered at the top of the page, was contextually about Joseph comforting his brothers who had left him for dead but overall it's a perspective of seeing how God can show good in one's life when situations seem so adverse.
You (cancer diagnosis, in my thinking) "intended to harm me, but God intended it for good." (Genesis 50:10)

The author expounded on the intent of wanting to savor life saying,  "When what you see in front of you is so far outside of what you dreamed, but you have the belief........to call it beautiful instead of calling it wrong, that's celebration."

In hindsight or introspection of said event, I can see my rare MAC cancer as one of the BIGGEST BLESSINGS of my life. An event worth celebrating.