"FIX-IT" MENTALITY

11/30/10 Is it a female thing? Or just a Dotsy thing? I am forever trying to “fix” situations so that I, or my loved ones, don’t feel the brunt of pain. My cuppa mental-i-TEA is sweetened with a spoonful of "fix-it" and sweet milk each day! Isn't that what all mothers drink in large quantities!

I’ve made it a life-long practice to run interference for others. When the kids were young it was so like me to have them come with their boo-boos so Mommy could kiss it & make it better. Even though I know children and adults alike learn in the midst of struggle and hardship, there is still this part of me that wants to minimize the pain. 

Problems are part of life---the first 5 words in this morning’s Jesus Calling entry. That was followed by the admonition not to let “fixing things” be a top priority. The spiritual flip to that was, “Talk with Me……rather than trying to fix everything, ask Me….” I was so convicted about this fallacy in my life that I talked to Karla about it during the beginning of 3rd period. (11am EST) Returning home around 4:30, the phone rang and the tone of Larry’s voice let me know something was very wrong. Josh has been in a wreck (around 11 am EST) he said---don’t worry, he’s going to be all right. 

 

He’s been at the hospital for tests and Megan has been with him. He’ll call us back later with more info though tests show no broken bones or concussion. Then Larry explained the wreck and I got weak and woozy and scared just hearing about it. 

Witnesses feared the worst for the rider.

Josh was on his Vespa, which he rides in his Brooklyn neighborhood between home & work, to ease traffic and parking problems. A car ran a red light and Josh saw it coming. He leaned the Vespa over not to be hit upright, I guess. The car ran over Josh and the Vespa but thankfully Josh stayed between the wheels of the car. The handlebars caught and Josh had the presence of mind to push away so that he wouldn’t be drug under the car wheels as his bike was. Both he and the Vespa were dragged ‘til the car wheels were jammed. 

Though weak and scrapped, Josh, much to the amazement of bystanders, crawled out from under the car. An ambulance was called and Josh was taken to the hospital, as stated earlier. While waiting on Josh to call us back, my thoughts have gone in so many directions. Josh whose baby pictures I had just put on the blog 15 days ago has had a close enough brush with death that it leaves me sick at my stomach. 

I can’t fix it. I can’t make it all better. But............I do know the One who can. 

....let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, (Hebrews 12:1b-2a) Let go and F.O.C.U.S. on the One who is in control.

The King is Coming

11/28/10 Join me in meditating on Psalm 24 on the first Monday of the Advent season.

1 The earth is the LORD’s, and everything in it, 
 the world, and all who live in it;

2 for he founded it on the seas 
 and established it on the waters.
3 Who may ascend the mountain of the LORD? 
 Who may stand in his holy place? 

4 The one who has clean hands and a pure heart, 
who does not trust in an idol 
or swear by a false god
5 They will receive blessing from the LORD and vindication from God their Savior. 

6 Such is the generation of those who seek him, 
who seek your face, God of Jacob.
7 Lift up your heads, you gates; 
 be lifted up, you ancient doors, 
that the King of glory may come in.

8 Who is this King of glory? 
The LORD strong and mighty, the LORD mighty in battle.

9 Lift up your heads, you gates; 
 lift them up, you ancient doors, 
that the King of glory may come in.
10 Who is he, this King of glory? 
 The LORD Almighty—he is the King of glory.

"In-between times"

11/28/10 That phrase sort of reminds me of the dash on a tombstone---the time between birth and death. During this time between Thanksgiving and Christmas, I want to make the most of the time given without wiping out my good intentions with self-induced stress. Certainly my plate is full---I actually just leave my suitcase open in the hallway for easy repacking between trips. Yet, as Jesus Calling entries have reminded me everyday for a week, the key to making the most of “in-between” times is:

• Thank me. (11/21).
  
• Thankful attitude. (11/22)
  
• Thankful stance. (11/23)
  
• Thankfulness removes the sting of adversity. (11/24)
  
• Thank me in every situation. (11/25)
  
• Walk….the high road of thanksgiving. (11/26)
• Let thankfulness rule in your heart. (11/27)
  
• …life steeped in thankfulness. (11/28)

I was affirmed in my “in-between” musings as I just opened and read my son’s newsletter to Allen Bible Church & friends. Pithy with a punch---he says it much better than I could. (Bold print = my emphasis.)

A friend of mine once said, "There are three words every human being should learn to say: “Hello,” “Goodbye,” and in between, “Thank You." Recently, as a church family, we have said goodbye with tears of grief to loved ones and hello with tears of joy to new little ones. And the Lord is teaching us the brevity of life and the blessings of family and each other. In this season and our study of Philippians, He's reminding us that our citizenship is in heaven and we're "in between," and that each day "in between" is the time to learn to say, "Thank You."
I pray that you will truly take in this Thanksgiving as a gift from Him to be with your family, even the ones who bring to mind words other than "thank You." Scripture seems to indicate that life "in between" is best lived and at its richest when we give thanks because He is good. He is good. Whether your meal is a sandwich or a smorgasboard, I pray you and I marvel and thank Him for His goodness in giving us families, "best buds" but even taste buds, so we can savor the textures and flavors of this season and "taste and see that the Lord is good!" (Buddy Liles)

Thankfulness is the language of love for these "in between times."

BLACK FRIDAY THOUGHTS

11/26/10 I am not a shopper & have never been a shopper---but I was the daughter of one and am married to one. That's the good news! The bad news is the "ticker-tape" thoughts. You know the kind---those thoughts that allow the jettison of large amounts of shredded guilt and concerns to abound. The agonizing "bad at shopping" ones that continually float through, no matter how often I try to throw them out. All the ads and commercials fuel these feelings. I mull on all my inadequacies in this area and assume that's the reason I don't already have all my shopping done and gifts wrapped. Then I begin the control aspect. The overplanning starts. The list is made. A list that is impossible to accomplish in a given month, much less weeks. Good things are on that list---but I can't do them all. Panic takes hold. That's when the "grayness of my thoughts" (S. Young, Jesus Calling 11/26) begin to loom in my psyche. It's sad how quickly the gray can give way to black and all seems hopeless.
On this "black Friday" may I seek the light of his Presence. May I replace my guilt and fear with thankfulness. I might not tear up my list but I hope to "tweak" it with His input and not be afraid to "erase" the non-essentials.

THANKSGIVING TREATS

11/25/10 Daddy took Larry and me to lunch as “his” guests to the “Friendship House.” Actually, brother Bobby and Larry worked out the details because Daddy had even forgotten to sign up for himself. He had just responded to my comment of all I was cooking for our Thanksgiving lunch with, “I eat at Friendship House everyday.” So, as not to mess with his routine, I put the dinner in the freezer for another time.
As we left to walk over for the lunch, the rain started and Daddy, somewhat flustered, asked how we would get there. He sheepishly admitted that he didn’t know how to drive there. Whew, that put a lump in my throat!
Upon arrival, we entered a different door than Daddy’s “normal” entrance---this too caused momentary concern on his part---as if he feared being lost or not knowing how to escort me in. Heartbreaking.
Finding a table, with his name on it, he admitted that this wasn’t where he normally sat but we assured him this was his table because his name was written with “2 guests” included. Reading that helped a lot and the dinner turned out to be a real "tasty" treat.
It was also an eye-opening event for me. Walkers were everywhere----some lining the wall. Red, green, black, gray and several shades of blue. All with wheels, hand brakes and a little seat---some put their plates on that part. One lady lifted hers to deposit an extra roll. I assume for her later consumption. Daddy’s is black, though he didn’t need his because I was his walker. Almost every table had at least one pulled up beside it, though a few had canes and two folks were in wheelchairs.
The treat in all of this was not only being with Daddy but also in being privileged to see how family and caregivers don’t just discard the elderly.

Proverbs 23:22 Listen with respect to the father who raised you, and when your mother grows old, don't neglect her………. (The Message)

Aging is difficult. As Daddy realizes how much ground he is losing both mentally and physically, it’s hard on him. It’s hard on all of us. It’s not life as we once knew it. Daddy is not a complainer but this season has recently discovered difficulties for him. He needs help in new ways. I see his fear when he announces that he can’t quite remember how to shave or admit that he can no longer find his way.
Yet, he still knows I am his daughter and he proudly introduced me to Pedro and Bertha, one couple whom he still recognizes from years ago. What a treat that was. He also introduced me to the lady at the next table. (Pauline Joyner, age 97) Then he leaned in and whispered, I have no idea who she is. What a treat to share that joke with him---though his “stage whisper” could probably be heard by half the room.
What a privilege it is to spend time with Daddy and honor him by giving back.

Ephesians 6:1) "Honor your father and mother" is the first commandment that has a promise attached to it, namely, "so you will live well and have a long life." (The Message)

TRUE CONFESSIONS

11/23/10 They say confession is good for the soul. In this case, it’s not me I’m concerned about, but you, my blog reader. My confession is for you. I don’t want my blog entries to set myself up as a user of Jesus as a “quick fix”---though He certainly can be if He chooses.

If you read yesterday’s entry, it probably seemed that I went from anxiety to calm in a matter of moments. What was not written was the times of anguish and out of control behavior that preceded that calm. Often times the blog entries are a synopsis of the event---from my poor choices to my right choices so that all is well. Trust me, all would be well a lot sooner if I would just keep my focus on Him. Some days I’m better at that than others. The good news is that regardless of my choices, He remains faithful. I want to inspire others with that truth---even when my actions seem to disregard it.

So--------------here’s the confession. Before I got to the washing away of the anxiety by being in His word and having a cup of tea alongside, I had complained to my hubby, had some “justified” anger that caused tears and tossed and turned several nights. I decided to “do something” for someone else. (still not sure if it was totally for someone else.) I made peanut brittle for Daddy. Old handwritten cooking times on the recipe were obviously for the old microwave because I burned the whole batch. I had a real come apart. Then I preceded to eat almost the entire SCORCHED batch

Anxie---TEA

10/22/10 Anxie---TEA. Not the drink of choice but I have certainly been drinking a lot of it lately. (Hm-m-m, maybe it is a choice.) I do know it’s so strong it has my stomach feeling pitted. It’s just all of life’s “stuff” and much of it I can’t change. I can only change my at-TEA-ude about it. One of the big problems of the continual sipping of this anxie—TEA is that it tends to overflow and “burn” others in my life. More often than not, the one’s closest to me. I need to put this cuppa down and refuse to pick it up.

I need a cuppa of soothing, calming serene---TEA! The best way to get that it is to sweeten whatever tea you’ve been given with
thanksgiving. I chose some chamomile and these verses from Paul.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:6-7)

BTW---In the midst of all of this, in the dark thirty of arrival at work ,I broke my favorite tea cup---favorite because of its size & because I bought it in Cambridge, England. I remember running in the rain (getting drenched) with Larry & Abe & Peggy. (2002) Our little walkway lead us serendipitously down a lane to a tucked away tea room---so warm & cozy and their pot of tea hit the spot. Paying our tab I saw the little blue & white tea cup on a “sale” shelf----well the rest is history and on a rainy Tuesday a week ago the teacup itself became history. I call it my ”stress” fracture. Stress caused it & now both I and my cup are fractured.

Happy Birthday, Josh!

11/21/10 It seems that 35 years have flown by since I first brought my second son home from the hospital. I remember his little cap of dark hair so similar to what I saw on his nephew, Andrew’s, little head just last week. I also remember that he was born early in the morning and they only let me stay one night. 5 years earlier, with his brother’s birth, I had stayed 3 or 4 nights. On his our first night home in our big old Memphis State faculty house on Central, (I was teaching at the university at that time.) Josh got choked on all that fluid that still needed to be suctioned out. I panicked and it was Larry’s mother, Mommar, who came to the rescue.
He also had his days and nights mixed up and about the only thing that would make him sleep would be riding in the car. Many a late night, we would bundle him up and go for a spin---no seat belts, just a babe in arms or a car bed. (Haven’t times changed!)
I also remember my Christmas present from Larry that year (1975)---he stayed up with Josh all night, mostly walking the floor with him. I got a full night’s rest for the first time in over a month. Now that’s a gift.
Of course, Josh has been the real gift. And with him, as with each of his siblings, I’ve had other sleepless nights during those teen years but never once has he shown anything but love and respect for us and has brought us great joy.
Through the years, my gift to him has been prayer. I’ve prayed Proverbs 21 for him for both direction and protection……from verse 3, that Josh may always choose “To do what is right and just” because that “is more acceptable to the LORD than sacrifice,” and I praise the Lord for his generosity to us and others as he chooses not to “shut his ears to the cry of the poor” (v.13) as he continues not to show partiality.
Tonight his wife, Megan, has given him a gift of tickets to the Patriots/Colts game in Foxboro, MA. Now that’s his kind of gift!
(I keep scanning the fans as the camera pans the stadium to see if they focus on my baby boy on his birthday---so like a mom.)

Estate Sale

11/20/10 Passing the corner of Shady Grove & E. Shady Gove, I saw the Jerry Copeland Estate Sales sign in a familiar yard. I was “taken aback” as Mama Davenport used to say.

Usually an estate sale is held to “dispose of a substantial portion of the materials owned by a person who is recently deceased, or who must dispose of his personal property to facilitate a move.” (Dictionary.com) If not death, then downsizing, possibly to assisted living, comes to my mind. I was wondering about the reason for this sale because I have a connection, albeit small, to that home.

The house is close enough to my neighborhood that I pass it fairly regularly. I rarely pass it that I don’t have memories come flooding back. I think back to the “woman of the house” who so willingly opened those doors of her home to a bunch of young Pi Phi (college sorority) alums. It was there that we planned an event for the on-campus girls, which would also be held at her house. Her home was warm and inviting because she was so hospitable. I’ve never seen a “for sale” sign there since those years in the early-70s so I assume she continued to live there. For years I could recall her name. Today I couldn’t. That saddens me.

What I do remember is the warm feeling I got every time I passed that house. I was reminded of the fun times with sorority sisters both as actives and alums---many who now are sisters in faith. Even in our college days, we learned to consider one another more important than ourselves and to be mindful of our thought life---keeping it pure. What we didn’t consider was how short life can be or how quickly the angst of aging can come. At least, it seems to me to come very quickly.

Yet you do not know what your life will be like tomorrow. You are just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away. (James 4:4)

Consider this....

11/17/10 Consider how difficult it is to post a blog entry when said entry is on a flash drive that is not available----temporarily misplaced, maybe?? Imagine that!
11/18/10 FOUND! Consider how thankful I am to have my flash drive.

(Original entry) Jennifer, my H2H friend, sent me day 2 of CRM’s (Church Resource Ministry) “A Wonderful Week of Devotions focused on Thanksgiving.”

Day 2 
Allow your heart to assume a posture of gratitude.

That sentence started me considering all that I had to be thankful for in the middle of an otherwise muddled week. So many things were pulling at me---robbing me of my joy and yet I was being “nudged” to consider thinking on other things. How about you? Do you need to reconsider your thought life? As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he: (Proverbs 23:7) Maybe changing our thinking will change our heart and a posture of gratitude will follow.

Who is wise? Let him give heed to these things,
And consider the lovingkindnesses of the LORD. (Psalm 107:43) Certainly God’s goodness and kindness is something to be thankful for.

As your heart fills with gratitude and those feelings of thanksgiving begin to grow, consider telling others. (overflow) Otherwise it will be similar to wrapping a gift and keeping it all to yourself.

Today, let’s give thanks together. (Verbally) Consider the impact that would have on those whom the Lord has cross our path.

Meatless Monday

11/15/10 Food Network’s iron chef, Mario Batali, may have “meatless Mondays” at his restaurants but no “meatless Mondays” here. We all need to chew on the meat of God’s word even though I’m a little late dishing it up for you.

14 In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God’s word all over again. You need milk, not solid food! (meat) 13 Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness. 14 But solid food (meat) is for the mature, who by constant use, have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil. (Hebrews 5:12-14)

THOT---don’t just look at the meat, chew on it and flesh it out----it’s the constant use of the meat from God’s word that helps one discern good from evil.

WELCOME TO THE WORLD .......

11/12/10 More info as soon as it becomes available. Buddy and Day have been at the hospital since 7 a.m.

ANDREW LAWRENCE LILES (strong lungs evident as his 4 big brothers viewed him through the nursery window) cap of dark hair
6 lbs. 14 oz. 19 1/2"
1:29 p.m.
Dallas
Margot Perot Hospital (Texas Health Presbyterian Hospital)

Mommy, Day, had breathing problems following delivery---docs have decided to keep her in lavor and delivery area for observation as a precaution only. She just ate some dinner so she should be well on her way to full recovery----that's our prayer.

Joyfully Expectant

11/10/10 Headin' to Texas for the birth of a new grandbaby----will keep you posted. Have already been praying for this new little one---for salvation at an early age and a godly spouse to "minister" alongside. Because as 3 John says I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.

As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: (Psalm 127:4-5a)

No. 2

11/9/10 The ubiquitous yellow No. 2. These pencils continue to be a standard in education. At the high school level, their main purpose seems to be in the test-taking realm. TCAP, ACT and other standardized tests require them. Exams and end of course tests that are scored using Scantrons still use them---maybe because the softer lead/graphite makes erasure easier.

Just yesterday, Tootsie sent me an e-mail with pencil art. I didn’t see any author so I can’t give credit but some really sharp pencil points were given. (Just had to throw that in because y’all know how I love my pencil points to be extra sharp!) Read and determine for yourself the spiritual implications of the analogy.

5 Important lessons for Pencils of Purpose

1. REMEMBER, EVERYTHING YOU DO WILL LEAVE A MARK.
2. YOU CAN ALWAYS CORRECT THE MISTAKES YOU MAKE .
3. WHAT’S IMPORTANT IS WHAT IS INSIDE OF YOU.

4. IN LIFE, YOU WILL UNDERGO PAINFUL SHARPENINGS, WHICH WILL ONLY MAKE YOU BETTER.
5. TO BE THE BEST PENCIL, YOU MUST ALLOW YOURSELF TO BE HELD AND GUIDED BY THE HAND THAT HOLDS YOU.

As most of my readers know, I am constantly sharpening pencils, especially in times of stress. It’s just so therapeutic for me. However, I need to cease striving and like the good ole No. 2, allow the Hand that guides my life to hold me and use me for His purpose.

Plan A to Plan B to Plan C and so on...

11/8/10 I would say I’m already to Plan S this month but last week even that

"plan" didn’t work. My new “hold on to your mind” plan seemed to be a “bust.” In the night, every time I would awaken, I’d remind myself, 3 Ss---don’t forget. Swimsuit. Sympathy card. Salad dressing. Half way down the street, headed to work----Oh no, I forgot my swimsuit with the sympathy card right on top of it. Turnaround required. Arrived at work at 5:35 am and all was good “til I went to put away my lunch goodies and I don’t even have the salad dressing. So much for Plan S.

I do know the basics of the best plan for my memory struggle. I need to D.A.N.C.E. through it. However, the steps for this dance seem somewhat complicated, especially when I feel silly asking for inane things like recovering lost/misplaced items (though I did find the black bathing suit)

Regardless of how I “feel” I need to continue to call out to Him. That’s His plan for me. You probably need that as well. Therefore, think on these verses today.

Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you. (Jeremiah 29:12)

Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and show thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not. (Jeremiah 33:3)

AWARENESS

11/3/10
Sometimes I feel as if I’m walking in a fog, or worse yet, driving in a fog. That is a scary thought----because I’ll look up (become aware of) where I am and wonder how I got there, since I have no recollection of passing familiar landmarks.

Have you ever felt that you’re on the threshold of something, you’re just not sure what? Am I entering or exiting? Coming or going? Often my threshold feels more like a revolving door, one without an exit. I just keep going around.

I can’t seem to recall those things I try so hard to remember. This is day 3 of my work week and I have yet to remember to bring Sunday’s Chinese leftovers for lunch. (At this point, I think I’ve missed a “use by” expiration date.) Even this morning coming in to work I realized I had picked up my swim bag rather than my book bag? On the other hand those things, I wish I could forget will creep back in as those “if onlys” whir around my mind, robbing me of my joy.

What is happening to the threshold of my mind? Is it A. aging, B. stress, or C. distraction? Maybe answer D----all of the above. The big question is what do I do about it? I don’t have a clue.
But God…………..gave me the word mindful.

Test me, LORD, and try me, examine my heart and my mind; for I have always been mindful of your unfailing love and have lived in reliance on your faithfulness. (Psalm 26:2-3)

I just need to be mindful of Him and trust His faithfulness for my “awareness.” Maybe that way I will focus on what’s important, let some things go and see the rest as opportunities to “communicate more with Him.” (S. Young, Jesus Calling 11/3)

God's Answer

11/2/10………for Hannah Helen Hasslen is “Hannah’s home in heaven.” Early this morning Larry told me our son, Buddy, called last night with news of Hannah’s death. I felt punched in the stomach, sad all over, and at the same time grateful for God’s mercy. Just yesterday I had cried out to the Lord for mercy for that sweet little girl and an extra measure of grace for the family. Death was God’s answer.

Though death seems like a hard answer, God's goodness was evident as Hannah spent her last 3 nights at home. Doctor Hannah was able to see some folks, trick or treat (briefly) alongside her brother, Iron Jake, in a wagon & then have the best night’s sleep of the last month---in her own home. Sunday night did not bode so well as nausea and pain resumed along with anxiety of returning to the hospital. Monday’s plan was to take her to the American Doll store to look for a Ruth doll on the way back to the hospital for her noon appointment---as I understand it Hannah was never “fully” readmitted to the hospital but was sitting quietly in the transfusion area with her mom and dad as they stroked her hair when, as her father said, “it was as if the Lord just swooped in and took her home.”

Last “tweets” from the family that give insight into her final day.

November 1 Updates:

• 7:24 a.m. From best to worst! Han & Amy had rough night with no sleep! Han nauseated all night---anxiety about going back to hospital today. (Remember the night before had been best night of sleep in over 1 month! Thank you Jesus!)
  
• 1:03 p.m. Need prayers for Han! Very sick in doctors office! All main blood tests came back worse! Jesus - we need You now!!
• 1:39 pm Waiting for dr. on next steps. Giving her fluids, blood & anti nausea meds. Prob readmit to hospital. Should feel better soon.
• 5:30 p.m. Update - doctors had decided to let Hannah go home after blood but then Han had crazy reaction. She's being admitted to hospital.
• Tonight @6pm, Hannah Helen Hasslen passed away & went home to the Lord! Her death was unexpected, sudden, peaceful and without pain.

11:01 pm We would like to thank everyone for their outpouring of prayers, support & love given to Hannah in her last days and to our entire family!

Hannah’s parents have requested that her service be a testimony to the character of God and a celebration of Hannah’s life. Also, in lieu of flowers, gifts could be given to the Samaritan's Purse - Operation Christmas Child because “Han loved filling those shoeboxes.” They have asked that the song “Majesty” be sung as that’s the song they sung over her when she was born.

Majesty, worship His Majesty 

Unto Jesus, be all glory,
Power and praise 

Majesty, Kingdom authority 

Flow from His throne, 
Unto his own, His anthem raise. 

So exalt,
lift up on high
The Name of Jesus

Magnify, come glorify,

Christ Jesus the King

Majesty, worship His Majesty 

Jesus who died, now glorified,

King of all Kings.

Hannah Helen Hasslan was God’s answer to a young couple’s prayers and now, though heart broken, her parents accept God’s answer as His best for Hannah and look forward with great hope to the day they will see her again.

F.A.I.T.H.

Focusing
All
I
Think
Heavenward

Saturday as opened my devotional book, (My Utmost for His Highest) a square of rich, linen writing paper fell out. Jeremiah 24:6-7 was written out on it. Mary Flo had given it to me last October 30. It's the reminder of her prayer for some folks whom I dearly love.

6 My eyes will watch over them for their good, and I will bring them back to this land. I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. 7 I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the LORD. They will be my people, and I will be their God, for they will return to me with all their heart.

Today as I meditated on this passage, I prayed those verses for them as well. Is there anyone in your life that you desire to pray, " God give them a heart to know You, that You are Lord?
Do you believe God for the answer? Do you ever struggle with that? Oswald Chambers (10/30 entry) states: that faith is boundless.

I'm struggling, so I'm focusing all I think heavenward---about this scripture as a prayer for those I love) Won't you join me in continuing to pray in boundless faith?