Assignment: EYES

2/10/09
Journal jottings: shaky awakening---what was the missed cell phone call about ---the one from Dr. Ha at 2:53 yesterday---Why’s he calling? I’m not “ready” to go---too much still undone--- updating will (the last testament kind), repacking for different temps, letter to be written to my kids---okay, so they’re adult kids, I still want to tell them how much I love them---Grandaddy’s in hospital & his pain’s not subsiding, Mommar needs a village, …etc. PTL, Larry has 3 siblings to take up that slack. “Settle,” as Larry would say, so I did. Nothing can fortify like a big dose of God’s Word & a steamy bowl of oatmeal (no instant for me) w/ real butter and real sugar and real milk---not the “see through” variety that is usually in our fridge. My oatmeal this morning might even give the “Batesville blend” a run for its money---though mine wasn’t served to me in bed. The Mary B.s tea biscuits are a good accompaniment as well. (Family aside---as close to Mother/Gigi biscuits that you can buy---must be made with Sunflower, milled only in Hoptown. Mother/ Gigi always used Sunflower, probably because Mr. Yost went to First Methodist with us. Most of the time she baked biscuits and cornbread with buttermilk. If not, her recipes listed ”sweet milk” ---& she didn’t mean Eagle Brand.)

Jesus Calling reminded me I needed to spend ”ample” time with the Lord and let go or push back some of the demands of the day knowing that He is able to bend time and events in my favor---under His guidance I will be able to sort out what is important and what is not. I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go: I will counsel you with My eye upon you. (Psa. 32:8)

Is “eye” the word of the day? I don’t have eyes that can read without glasses---and for awhile I won’t even have a nose to prop those spectacles on. I am a reader---so I’m probably going to have to be read to for awhile---this could be a new adventure. I’m the reader/storyteller---I’m the one whose license plate said, “IREAD2U”---sounds like a lesson in humility is coming up.
A “worry” (working on giving it to the Lord) that has come forth since Michele asked me some thought provoking questions, concerns eyes. She asked what my greatest “fear” was about my surgery. At first, nothing came to mind. Now the fear is identified----the eyes of others on my new face---not for me as much as others---a face that would evoke sympathy or embarrassment for my family and friends------ especially for my grandsons.
I don’t want them to be self-conscious about their Shug.
So readers---you have an assignment ---what does God have to say about eyes (or my fear) that will realign my thinking with His? Open my/our eyes that I/we might behold wonderful things from Thy law. (Psa. 119:18)

It’s all about eyes---my eyes, (physical eyes) other’s eyes (judging eyes) God’s eyes ---the eyes of our heart---those spiritual eyes.

For me, I know that I can “lift up mine eyes unto the hills from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord, who made heaven and earth. (Psalm 121:1)