Sometimes I feel as if I’m walking in a fog, or worse yet, driving in a fog. That is a scary thought----because I’ll look up (become aware of) where I am and wonder how I got there, since I have no recollection of passing familiar landmarks.
Have you ever felt that you’re on the threshold of something, you’re just not sure what? Am I entering or exiting? Coming or going? Often my threshold feels more like a revolving door, one without an exit. I just keep going around.
I can’t seem to recall those things I try so hard to remember. This is day 3 of my work week and I have yet to remember to bring Sunday’s Chinese leftovers for lunch. (At this point, I think I’ve missed a “use by” expiration date.) Even this morning coming in to work I realized I had picked up my swim bag rather than my book bag? On the other hand those things, I wish I could forget will creep back in as those “if onlys” whir around my mind, robbing me of my joy.
What is happening to the threshold of my mind? Is it A. aging, B. stress, or C. distraction? Maybe answer D----all of the above. The big question is what do I do about it? I don’t have a clue.
But God…………..gave me the word mindful.
Test me, LORD, and try me, examine my heart and my mind; for I have always been mindful of your unfailing love and have lived in reliance on your faithfulness. (Psalm 26:2-3)I just need to be mindful of Him and trust His faithfulness for my “awareness.” Maybe that way I will focus on what’s important, let some things go and see the rest as opportunities to “communicate more with Him.” (S. Young, Jesus Calling 11/3)