S = Solace

1/12/10 One Year ago today ---BIOPSY! Just that word can send one running to seek solace. (comfort, consolation, support, relief)
I took off during lunch to “run up” to have the “punch” biopsy done. Whew, I felt like he took out a big plug. (In retrospect, I know that to be a good thing since many a MAC diagnosis has been missed because the doc didn’t get a good specimen.) Afterwards, I was too light-headed and nauseous to even lift my head. Walking, with my weak knees, proved to be beyond me as well. Once I made it as far as the doorway only to have to go back and lie down with ice on my neck and forehead.

I’m glad I had asked Larry to meet me there just in case I got a result right on the spot. Instead he became my crutch to lean on (a position he has held often over the last year) and to get me to the car.

Dr. Schneider said the results would take at least 3 days.

Oh how I needed solace---the thought of three days of fearing the unknown was not a comforting thought. He became my Solace, my source of comfort throughout the rest of that day and that first (and last) night of waiting. I don’t remember if I even prayed or what I prayed if I did---but I know He was there.

Today the scripture prayer that comes to mind when needing solace/comfort is 2 Thessalonians 2:16-17.

Now may our Lord Jesus Christ Himself and God our Father, who has loved us and given us eternal comfort and good hope by grace, comfort and strengthen your hearts in every good work and word.

SUFFERING SERVANT

1/11/10 One year ago today, Taylor Park preached on “One-anothering in Suffering.” My journal notes included some great reminders of the One who suffered and died for us---the One who understands our suffering. He then emphasized the fact that suffering is a real part of the Christian community and just as Christ is there for us, we need to be there for others---to serve them in their time of need. Church needs to be a safe place for the hurting to come for solace and sanctuary.

JOURNAL JOTTINGS—(parenthetical jottings added 2010)
Bear one another’s burdens. Galatians 6:2 (Houston High School)
Intercede for one another. James 5 :16. (First Evan and folks worldwide)
Humbly serve one another. John 13:14 (T-Cups & other "nurses")
Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Romans 12:10 (Michèle)
Be kind to one another. Ephesians 4:32 (FAMILY & FRIENDS)
Be hospitable to one another without complaint. 1 Peter 4:9 (Mary Flo)

At the time I did not realize I would be the recipient in such a monumental way of each of these “one-anotherings.”
This past year, I have known God as never before. Part of the reason is because of the goodness of God's people who took on His role and have served me in my suffering, time and time again, often at the expense of themselves.
I remain overwhelmed and truly grateful.

Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10

(My verse today because it's still where I need to be.*)
Obviously need it because I had this written in my am blog notes draft, saw it etched over the chapel at Baptist Women's Hospital and just finished my pm reading in Jesus Calling and there it was. 3 times of anything always gets my attention. It's my "rule" for a "heads up."

S = Savior who stills my storms

1/10/10 One year ago today I read in Jesus Calling: " Every time you affirm your trust in Me.....you build up equity in preparation for days of trouble. Practice trusting Me during quiet days....then when storms come, your trust balance will be sufficient to see you through."

He maketh the storm a calm, so that the waves thereof are still. (Psalm 107:29)

Then I prayed, "Lord if this doesn't "matter" for eternity, I'd rather it not be cancer."

2009 was a year of lots of storms for the Liles family---many of which would qualify for a "10" on the stress scale---but God.....was there through each storm as our very present help.

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. (Psalm 46:1)

"Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass; it's about learning how to dance in the rain." This quote, of unknown origin, succinctly states the beginning of my "dance" in my 2009 storm.

"S" words covered by my "Safety Net"

1/9/10 One year ago today I heard the word biopsy* come out of Dr. Schneider's mouth.
When you hear biopsy and it pertains to you, it's like "hearing" it for the very first time.

Though he'd never seen anything like it before and it didn't look like cancer, a biopsy was the starting point in order to rule it out.

"S" words ensued---

• surprise---2 other doctors had seen it ('91 & '94) and had dismissed it saying I wouldn't want to "mess" with it because of scarring
• socked in the stomach jolt---CANCER----that's a word I pray for others not to have
• sick---a little, but "it doesn't look like cancer" was ringing louder than the biopsy word
• scared---does a biopsy hurt????
• suffering???---I'm not big on pain

As the world, as I had known it, began to shake, my "Safety Net" began to unfold.

The fear of man lays a snare but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe. (Proverbs 29:25)

Sanctuary--- “S” = safe haven because we are secure in Him.

1/6/10 Even the on-line dictionary defines sanctuary not just as a safe haven but also a holy place. It actually lists the “sacred” element of the word first. I certainly equate it with refuge provided by a holy God.

In Genesis 12:8 I see an example of both the outer (physical) and inner (spiritual) sanctuary:

Then he (Abram/Abraham) proceeded from there to the mountain on the east of Bethel, and pitched his tent, with Bethel on the west and Ai on the east; and there he built an altar to the LORD and called upon the name of the LORD

Today’s My Utmost For His Highest entry described Bethel as the symbol of communing with God and Ai as the symbol of the world. Just as he pitched his tent between the two, we are reminded of the importance of always pitching our tents (finding sanctuary) in order to have quiet times with the Lord----regardless of the noise of the world around us and often even in the midst of it.

Many of us today seek physical sanctuaries as a refuge from all that the world throws at us. They are different for each of us---a beach, the mountains, a monastic retreat center, a closet, a prayer chair or just a simple prayer cloth worn over the head, as JoLynn taught the Talapneco ladies in Mexico. But it is there that we find real sanctuary when we take it to the next level as we commune with Him in worship.

In Moses’ time the inner sanctuary of the tabernacle was the most holy place, "Holy of Holies"---where the priests met with God. It was an actual physical place to meet with the Almighty.

Find your sanctuary today. Meet with the One who is your sanctuary forever.

He is the REASON

1/4/10

The

"R"s

of a

New Year's Spiritual Resolution

Remember

Refresh

Remain

Restore

Revive

Rejoice

Renew

Return

Rely

Source: e-mail from CMF

Quiet is the “Q”

1/3/10 Often as I praise alphabetically in the middle of the night, I praise the Lord for His quiet and gentle spirit. It’s the side of Him (or attribute) that brings me comfort.

When my “anxious thoughts multiply within me,” like going back to work and tackling 2 grants and some unknowns, it’s the “Quiet God” (Upper Room 1/1) whom I seek. It is so easy for me to slip into fear mode when I have doubts about my self---some of them pretty well founded since this last surgery. I just can’t seem to remember things. Even now, I’m having trouble remembering any of those 9 days I was at work after medical leave and before semester break. (Except I do remember the butter cookies!)

So what’s a girl to do when she’s lost confidence in an area where she was once so self-assured? Hm-m-m, just typing it strikes a chord. SELF---needs to move over and sit and draw near and allow the Lord to quietly take over, “lead me beside still waters” and remind me that “In quietness and trust is your strength." (Isaiah 30:15)

Prince of Peace = P

1/2/10 Psalms for Women, a gift from Rick and Bonnie, reminded me of what Mrs. Charles E. Cowman, the author of “Streams in the Desert” wrote, “Two wings are necessary to lift our souls toward God: prayer and praise. Prayer asks. Praise accepts the answer.” I assert that it is in His Presence that prayer and praise are inexorably produced, thus leading to peace, regardless of the answer.

Peace and Presence are so-o-o connected---a profound peace comes as we experience His Presence in a powerful way.

For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counselor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father,The Prince of Peace. (Isaiah 9:6)

O is………..Omnipresence

1/1/10 Omnipresence is one of God’s divine attributes. God is present everywhere. It’s one of three characteristics that I dub as the ”all” attributes---omnipotence, “all powerful,” omniscience “all knowing” and omnipresent, “all the time.” It’s His unbounded universal Presence. He’s available always--in all situations and in all places. We just need to call upon Him in all places at all times.

If I have garnered anything from the past year, especially from “Jesus Calling,” it’s the importance of spending time in His Presence. Andrew Murray also emphasizes the importance of spending time alone with the Lord in quiet, uninterrupted communion. (The Secret of the Abiding Presence)

Today’s entry in “God Calling” reminded me that God stands between the years. He's there between the "auld lang syne"---those good ole days or not so good ole days and today and on into my future. “The light of My Presence is flung across the year to come.” What comfort that is!

Thou wilt make known to me the path of life; In Thy presence is fullness of joy: In Thy right hand are pleasures evermore. (Psalm 16: 11)

N---again!

12/31/09 Though “N” sections in the dictionary and the phone book are relatively short compared to the other alphabetical offerings, I have to include another “N” here because it is NECESSARY. That’s it. As 2009 closes out tonight, I would be remiss if I did not remind myself (and you, dear reader) that Jesus is necessary. I have never seen that in my life the way I have this year. He has been absolutely essential and indispensable for the Liles this year as we have faced my (MAC) cancer and ensuing surgeries, Grandaddy’s numerous ICU stays followed by his funeral, Mommar’s increasing “dementia,” a miscarriage, and engagement.

A few years ago I taught Luke 10:38-42 passage both at First Evan and at Germantown Methodist and I came face to face with myself. You probably know the story of the two sisters who welcome Jesus to their home. Mary sits at His feet and listens and Martha. “distracted with all her preparations,” asks the Lord to tell Mary to help her. But God….the Lord tells her that she (Martha) is worried and bothered about too many things, when only one thing is necessary. Can you guess which sister had chosen the one good thing? It wasn’t Martha.

38 Now as they were traveling along, He entered a village; and a woman named Martha welcomed Him into her home.39 She had a sister called Mary, who was seated at the Lord's feet, listening to His word. 40But Martha was distracted with all her preparations; and she came up to Him and said, "Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to do all the serving alone? Then tell her to help me." 41But the Lord answered and said to her, "Martha, Martha, you are worried and bothered about so many things; 42but only one thing is necessary, for Mary has chosen the good part, which shall not be taken away from her.(Luke 10:38-42)

I have lived many years as a “Martha”---a “driven” doer, a caretaker and a goal setter. This past year I have had time, thanks to the cancer diagnosis, to be a Mary---a Mary in a Martha world. The world kept going as normal but it was necessary for me to take time out and spend time at the Lord’s feet. He was NECESSARY in my life.

He is still necessary. He is my life!