CHOOSE: THE RIGHT ANSWER

The first "right" answer was easy for someone in her 7th decade!

Are you pregnant? No. 

Would you tell the tech if you thought you might become pregnant? That's a moot point. But it was the admission lady's first day.

Yesterday's blog space holder informed readers that I would share my answers to question, "how does one accept hard experiences without giving into negative emotions," as soon as I was allowed to throw the little "revealing" gown/robe into the "dirty" bin. 

Here's what I learned. 

First of all, I must confess several wrong assumptions based on previous unpleasant mammogram experiences---my visits would mostly keep me at West clinic until mid afternoon. Not yesterday! Quickest time ever. 

Of course, the shock soon gave way to fear that Jennifer, “the smasher,” missed something. It took a bit of time, but chose to see the shorter time-frame as a ”God kiss” and went on about my hectic day.

Also, the “little” gown I have given in the past was replaced with one so large I could have hidden a baby elephant in there with me. Of course, care was still taken to avoid full frontal exposure.

Usually, certain body parts would freeze when they came in to contact with the large machine and I could easily fall over from holding my breath so long. 

No longer the experience. Machine was a bit chilly but I never even had to hold my breath one time.

Mrs. Liles you may get your clothes and sill see you in a year. What? 

"No extra pictures or ultra-sounds? Those are a part of my routine." 

Obviously, not this time.

Given my little pink sheet I quickly, stuffed it in my “tote" and didn’t read the fine print until later. I saw normal/ negative. Then I saw the "dense" column was checked and they weren’t talking about my thinking process. GULP. 

“Denseness of breast tissue made it harder to evaluate and may also be associated with an increased risk of cancer. Report will be sent to your doc and together you can decide options right for you."

Maybe they were just covering their tracks or passing the buck, based on previous law suits.

But God reminded me that a "new" worry was not today's answer. He is the One who is the answer so once again I choose to trust Him  (Psalm 38:15)

"The Wait"

I'm typing as I sit in the "gowned waiting area" at the Methodist Hospital Breast Center. Trust me, gown is a loose term---real loose! Though one lady across from me seems to have on a deluxe model which actually has some oomph in the fabric and it actually covers her torso.

It's the waiting that is hard. My turn next.

Just a week ago I was at a different doctor for a biopsy and then came the real wait. Waiting for test results. Two days later a  "good" report was given. Today a different scenario but same need for waiting.

3D  screening complete. Doc will review. Please return to the waiting area. 

Just a month ago, my dear friend was in this place and a "wait" ensued after diagnosis of "biopsy needed" was given. Results showed cancer. More waiting as an MRI was ordered. Results showed more cancer on a different side. More waiting. Surgery needed. Doctors needed to coordinate their schedules. More waiting. Surgery schedule for 3 weeks later---therein was the real waiting. Surgery seemed successful with post-op positive indicators....BUT.....more waiting  needed for the official results.  

So what does one do while she waits. Pray. That's the easy answer, yet it's hard to do when one is right in the midst of the wait.  A wait filled with concern. A perfect time for intercessory prayer.

"Mrs. Liles." Diagnostic needed. Enter darkened room for further pictures.....two places on the left breast.  A least the "goop" is warm. 

Four years ago I had observed women in this situation in a  Waiting Room Angst blog entry.
As I wait in this dark place, it helped to go back and read it.

Ultrasound complete. Please wait in here until the doctor can review.

Renee returns. It's okay. Pretty sure it's a benign cyst.
You may go now....We'll just WAIT and watch.

Mammogram TEA-nsion

And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.(2 Corinthians 12:9, KJV)

'Tis the season for my annual mammogram and my anxiety is trying to creep  back up. There's just something about sitting in a mammogram waiting room that serves up a cuppa anxi-TEA, whether one sips from it or not. Anyone who has ever received the "dreaded call back" understands.

Today I am choosing not to allow the tension of the exam to result in my ingesting any anxie-TEA. 

Trust me, I couldn't conjure this courage up. But God had a verse for me....allowing His power to work best in my weakness. 

I really thought of God's strength as the pressure pusher that squooshed me digitally registered 9.4 pounds and then 12.0 pounds on the pull backs. How low can it go???

As I added the punctuation to that last sentence, the tech appeared and leaning down, she whispered in my ear, "We need to do an ultrasound. Okay?" What can one say but, "okay."
As the "Happy" song started playing in the background---I had to smile. If my gowntail would have stayed closed I might have gotten up for a "little dance." Even after the doctor had to come in to scrutinize ultrasounds 3 and 4, I sensed God's grace as discussions began.

My momentary fears and afflictions are just that. Momentary. Even in a call back or a less than perfect diagnosis. So, each year I go back because I have to. The alternative is not to know, and that is worse. This time I have to return sooner but today's event  has been better because I brought  God in with me. The reali-TEA station at the Methodist Hospital Breast Center was offering many a cuppa of uncertain-TEA to several of us ladies......

.......But God..... sweetened my cuppa by blending veraci-TEA from His word!
With a little background music!

......Because I'm happy
Clap along if you know what happiness is to you
Because I'm happy
Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do....(Pharrell Williams)

It's what I want to do---choose joy, not fear. 

Mammography Misery

7/7/11 Sitting in the waiting area of the Methodist Healthcare Breast Center, I was struggling with both fear and dread. "I know~ I know!" "In everything give thanks"(I Thessalonians 5:18) and that would include mammograms. I am grateful for this early detection, possibly life saving procedure. What I'm struggling with is past memories of the pain brought on by that tall, COLD, stainless pancake machine with the acrylic "flattener."

But God....had the receptionist hand me a "pile" of forms to fill out with the important stuff highlighted in pink. Forms to keep me "in the pink." Pink highlights to remind me that I use pink when I want to display text in my reading that has prayer references. I even had my pink highlighter with me, clipped to my "A Praying Life" book---already full of "pink." A gentle tap to remind me to pray.

I entered waiting area #3 (diagnostic side) in a spa-type robe, chosen over the dreaded hospital gown---thankful for a choice. The exam, though not exactly painless only required one "repeat" and was relatively quick for 8 views. I was then relegated to waiting area #4 until results were read and I could leave---depending on said results.

So....then I began to worry because it was done so quickly. Had the tech been thorough? (I forgot my thankful prayer for "speed" in this procedure.)
God covered that and had tech call me back for 2 ultrasounds. Dotsy wants thorough, Dotsy gets thorough! (and wet and time consuming and uncomfortable) Doctor reading results said "the girls" looked okay and she'd see me in a year.

A Germantown fire truck followed by an ambulance arrived as I was heading out the door. There are miseries worse than mammograms and I began to pray for the person that was getting ready to take that ride.