WORDLY WORRIES

2/6/10 Ice storms. Snow storms. Thunder storms. We have certainly been in a season of storms these last few weeks. Our sump pump has been “thumping” day and night. Our yard is still saturated from the most recent rain. Mommar, who is with us this weekend, really doesn’t like cold temps mixed in with soggy days. She’s longing for the sunshine. She wants to know if it’s ever coming. (She asks that question a lot.)

Just like our earthly weather, our lives have seasons of storms. We often wonder if they will ever end. Feeling “out of control," we began to worry. We lose hope for a better tomorrow. Many, I being chief among them, can begin worrying even before the storms come----approaching life with fear of what might happen tomorrow.

The sufferings of life are God’s winds. They are hurricanes taking us to higher levels…..when the storms of life appear, the atmosphere is changed, purified, filled with new life and part of heaven is brought down to earth. (Streams in the Desert, 2/4) Bring heavenly implications into your worldly worries.

The Israelites passed through the Red Sea and rejoiced. (Psalm 66:6) How many of us passing through a stormy season right now have already forgotten all the storms He has brought us through before? Focus on those times of seeing God’s goodness in the midst of the storm. Remember the relief and the rejoicing when you reached the other side. Remember that your hope is in Him. “I will only triumph in You once I have learned the radiance of the rain." (George Matheson) Find hope in the rain as well as the sunshine.

This past week I sent a card to a dear friend, recently diagnosed with breast cancer. Dayspring said it well. “Hope dances in the puddles ‘til the sun comes out again.”

Just like the weather, we can’t control those “givens” in our lives. What we do when facing them is our part. Acceptance. Hope. “Worry not” in the midst of life’s storms. Just keep dancing “til the sun comes out. ☺

WEIGHTY CHALLENGES

2/5/10 Life is full of challenges---from physical and mental to relational and spiritual. Last Saturday, the Commercial Appeal gave a review of the Mayo Clinic Diet which is divided into two phases; “Lose it!” and “Live it!’ The two week phase adds five habits, breaks five habits and adopts 5 bonus habits. One very challenging aspect (for 2 weeks) is no TV while eating and only watching as much TV as is equal to the amount of time you spend exercising---sort of a way to jump start exercising again---or just my awareness, maybe---- I’m giving it a try hoping that it will improve my energy level.

Of course, my first thought was what a bad week for a TV challenge with Super bowl coming up---but it made me realize what I needed to give up to accomplish my goal. Part of my solution has been to exercise (weights and stretching) while watching "Jeopardy" and "Nightly News." This allows me to “bank” my other swimming and walking times (so far only 1:25*) for the Super Bowl. At least I’ll get to watch the commercials. Though, I guess I’ll have to leave the room to eat all the goodies----hmmmm---really bad week for a challenge. Certainly not sustainable for me beyond the 2 week period. *(45 min. added since I first wrote this on my trusty light blue legal pad)

I guess life is always that way---never seems like a good time (easy time) to begin a discipline whether it’s a diet or finding time to exercise or be in the Word or in prayer---Challenges---some are easier than others (easy for you might be hard or"weighty" for me) but we all have them. What’s your greatest challenge in your spiritual life. Time? Interest? What spiritual discipline does your life need to make it a worthy/godly walk. What would help you sustain it.

God’s word says “suffering produces perseverance, perseverance character, and character, hope.” (Romans 5:3) My little 2 week challenge is in no way real suffering but it has opened my eyes to something I have been able to do and that builds my confidence/character and hopefully that will spill over to other areas of my life.

In the spiritual realm we are told, “Consider it pure joy my brothers whenever you face trials (challenges) because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. (sustainability) Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be pure and complete, not lacking anything. (James 1:2-4)

Challenge yourself for the next 2 weeks. Choose one habit to break----something that’s an obstacle to your spiritual growth. Add one habit that will benefit your spiritual growth. Your bonus will be a lifestyle change!

"WALK! WALK!!"

2/4/10 "Walk, walk." was one of Owen's first declarative sentences. However, declarative soon became imperative and as doting grandparents we followed his command. Last week Shug and Pop-Pop did just that. Although Owen’s sentence structure is now more complex, you still understand the “imperative mood” and we usually comply.

Walking with Owen is not exactly a walk. It’s more of an adventure. He ran to get ahead of me; he stooped down to investigate the crawly thing in the crack in the sidewalk; he picked an old stick (with dried leaves) out of a bush that was almost above his reach and then trotted along dragging it through the dust; he investigated the underside of an unusual wrought iron mailbox while he waited for the mail truck he could see in the distance. “It’s not Walter ,” he said.
Walter is Owen’s mailman and he doesn’t drive his mail truck but instead parks it at the end of O’s street. Walter walks on Owen’s block delivering mail through mail drops built into the old houses. There are no mailboxes on his street, thus Owen’s fascination with this new “delivery” method. The mailman didn’t know Owen ----yet. He answered his questions about “Where’s Walter?” and “Do you want to walk?” Owen got to know him and he seemed delighted to know Owen. We even crossed the street to “beat” him to another mailbox. We won. Actually we all won as we laughed with our new found friend.

There’s a lot to be learned from a walk with a grandson who is almost 3. He found joy along the way. When I go out for a walk it’s usually for the dreaded EXERCISE. For Owen, it’s like a dance---something to savor and enjoy every step of the way. I look at my watch. Owen revels in God’s creation. He looks down at bugs and up at the bushes. I hurry to finish my “goal” and return home. He makes new friends along the way.

" 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' " (Luke 10:27)

How can I love my neighbors if I don’t even know their names----I’ve decided to follow Owen’s lead. I’m going to find out my mailman’s name. It’s imperative that I do so.

Weeping Wednesday 2010

2/3/10 Last Wednesday I confessed somewhat jokingly to my leadership group that during the past week I had spent a lot of those days in “contentment time-out.” Appropriately, they laughed. Yet it’s sad in a way. Actually by the time I got to the meeting I had moved from time-out to remediation. Thanks to that day’s earlier praise walk, I was on the threshold of Contentment 101. That’s still square 1---and that’s sad! Confession is good for the soul but often it’s enough to make you cry-----thus my weeping Wednesdays.

For the next few months I’ll be studying Philippians with my Heart to Heart group at church. Joy is woven throughout Paul’s entire epistle and he was certainly in dire circumstances. I had been “under my circumstances” (fatigue) which is nowhere for me to be. I know better--- I just couldn’t seem to get my head up. So I am going to hang out in Philippians and ask the Lord to re-teach me the contentment dance.

I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. (Philippians 4:12) NIV

I know contentment is learned; I know that I am blessed beyond measure; I know that I was content throughout my cancer struggle so I know a few of the basic steps. I just have to get my eyes back on my dance partner because I’ve really been stepping on His toes a lot lately---not totally in sync. Maybe I’m trying to do the leading---and that’s a crying shame!

Meditative Meanderings

2/1/10 Last Wednesday I came home from work at 3:30 pm, with my usual mid-week “sinking spell, ” and sat down. Sitting is a costly mistake when one is tired, especially if Bible Study starts at 5:50. The lure of the couch and “This is……Jeopardy” continued to hold me. Rationalization: grant #2 was turned in; I deserved a break. Missing the “final jeopardy” question, I let my head fall back and was just about to kick my shoes off when I prayed for strength just to get up. I found my iPod and tried (unsuccessfully) to figure out how to get the ear bud to stay in my somewhat newly configured right ear. I put my coat on with the iPod in my pocket and started walking---just to the end of the street, I thought. When I got there, I chose my favorite praise music playlist and cranked up the volume. Before I knew it, I was walking down the sidewalk of busy, busy Kirby Parkway, without really even noticing the traffic. I had found Sanctuary “in the midst.” The sidewalk became a path of praise. Scripture from both the music and memory began to flood my mind and meditation followed. The walk only lasted 30 minutes but the musings stayed with me----that’s what meditation does---it stays with you and helps you figure things out. Bundle up and meander through your neighborhood today with meditation on your mind.

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. (Philippians 2:3-4)

V is for....

1/30/10 …..volumes of “V” words whirring in my mind with none anchoring yet. Virgin’s son. (Luke 1:27) Vine---John 15, my life-changing chapter. Victor----the victory is His. He is the victorious one. Through Him we have victory---we are more than conquerors (Romans 8:37) Conquerors are indeed victors. As I discovered in both Hungary and Mexico and especially through this last year He is also a very present help in trouble. (Psalm 46:1) He is TRUTH----veracity starts with “V” but I couldn’t find it in my concordance.

But God……………there was the “v” word right in my good old KJV, my grandmother’s Bible, with its broken binding, loose pages and cracked leather cover. “Verity”---in the concordance---not veracity but another great synonym for truth.

In our life’s journey we are all mere voyagers on this earth and it is the verity of the One who is Truth that guides us. Knowing His truth has set us free (Romans 8:2) As believers, we’re at least on the ship that’s headed in the right direction----eternity with Him. If we weren’t voyagers on His ship, we would be facing life without Him. I’m glad that even in the midst of life’s storms, we don’t have to be tossed around by every wave of circumstance or wind of doctrine (Ephesians 4:14-15) because we are stabilized by truth and anchored by the One who is Truth.

We need to listen up ------His verity speaks volumes.

Psalm 111:7--These works of His hands are verity and judgment; all His commandments are sure.
I Timothy 2:7--Whereunto I am ordained and a preacher, and an apostle, ( I speak the truth in Christ, and lie not) a teacher of the Gentiles in faith and verity.

SNOW DAY---MUSIC to ears of school kids & a few teachers

1/29/10 Lying in bed on this "snow day," (of sorts) I didn't see one single flake or hear any pelting of sleet but Channel 5 news announced it at 5 am. Even though Shelby County Schools was not included on the scrolling at the bottom of the screen, I took them at their word and went back to bed and snuggled down.

Too tired (or just plain lazy) to get up and too awake to sleep, I began to pray for my Friday folks and Clarence, Sally P., Keith, Gail, Gurner, Kim and others with “hospital” needs as they came to mind. Since I didn’t want to leave the warmth of my pile of covers and go to my prayer chair, I began to attempt to pray without request list or scripture---what a rambling attempt that was. (Can A.D.D. be a prayer diagnosis?)

My prayers were certainly not of the “foxhole” variety. I had no focus and no sense of urgency. After all, it was a “snow day” so I had all day to pray. Yet, in reality, I knew that once my feet hit the cold floor, I would be into my “to do” mode. “Be still and know that I am God” came to mind.

To “be” ---if you ever want to be confused look up that definition in the dictionary. (I didn’t need thoughts like transitive or intransitive or subjunctive or indicative mood floating in my mind.) I needed Him. “To be or not to be--that is the question” or so says Prince Hamlet in the Shakespearean play. But…..to pray or not to pray is not the question. Certainly not. One can’t ever question that! Pray without ceasing. (1 Thessalonians 5:17)

So…I allowed my intransitive be to become transitive as I quit just being and began to be in prayer with Him as my object/focus.* I began my bumbling attempts at prayer. So bumbling, in fact, that in the midst of praising the Lord for His attributes, my mind would flit to options for my morning oatmeal----cranberries...walnuts or both. But....I kept at it. Have you ever heard the old adage, “Pray ‘til you feel like praying”?

Stand in awe, and sin not: commune with your own heart upon your bed, and be still. (Psalm 4:4) I didn’t exactly stand in the vertical sense but I did “stand” in my mind as God took over----and that’s awesome!

At 6am the phone rang. I got up. It was Shelby County Schools informing me that schools were closed. How timely. I open the library a 6 am each day----glad I listened to news at 5. But God now had me on my feet so I went forth with a prayer in my heart---that today I would be all that He would have me to be.

*Apologies to my English teaching friends if this grammar lesson is all mixed up---just hope you get the point.

U = Understanding

1/25/10 Monday, as you know, is for meditation but did you know that meditation is the “Sunday of the Mind.” (my NAS Bible marginalia) Growing up in the 50s in Hoptown, blue law was in effect on Sundays, though I didn’t know it had a name. It’s just the way it was. And....we all accepted it. We all knew that Sundays meant that no stores were open. No protests evolved. We knew Sundays were set aside for spiritual stuff and rest.(afternoon naps at their best) It also meant roast beef for lunch because it could be slowly cooking while we were at church.

This “Monday’s Message” needs a “Sunday Mind.” So put aside other distractions and “put on your spiritual best” and approach God’s word with a rested mind ready to worship and feast on each morsel of truth.

Just yesterday I wrote about my “Sunday Mind”---a mind of stillness and acceptance. A “Sunday Mind” can lead to understanding. A few weeks ago we meditated on Psalm 46:10---a verse that urges us to be and to know---not to do or to act. Today I want us to be still and ask the One who Understands to give understanding to us. God Calling’s 1/7 entry suggests, “Try and grasp this.” “Dwell in thought on this---more and more saints have taken a lifetime to understand it.”
To me, that means put your “Sunday Mind” to it.

It’s just meditation. Meditation brings understanding---understanding of the One who came in human form (Philippians 2: 7), the One who understands our imperfections.

Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect. (Matthew 5:48)

Let me know what the Understanding One teaches you about this verse.

Sunday Summary

1/24/10 WARNING----You might not want to read this. It might wear you out. But…..if you decide to read it, please continue to its conclusion because there is always hope at the end of this turbulent tunnel called life.
A “War of Words” has been going on in my mind these first three weeks of 2010. Warring is difficult----battles wear me out. But…..they are necessary otherwise the wrong thoughts will take over. Those thoughts of fear and uncertainty can become the focus and that wrong focus can wear one out! "For as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.” (Proverbs 23:7)

Granted there are things that I can’t change---aging, the Haiti catastrophe, work hours, grant deadlines, family illnesses and choices of others. Possibly my reactions and responses to these givens need something, but what? Turning off the nightly news might temporarily relieve me of the claustrophobic thoughts/fears of being buried alive and weeping for those who have had to endure that. I try to push down that fear with scripture knowing that He has not given us a “spirit of fear” but of power….so where’s my power-----what can I do to help the Haitians. God has given me valid ways. Now, how do I help others see God’s goodness in the midst of this?


Haitians have needs, family has needs, friends have needs. I have needs---coherent thoughts and an ability to articulate words that seem to “trip” coming out of my new mouth. I need more time for praise and prayer for folks with appropriate scripture verses and a computer that doesn’t frustrate me. I need to remember to remind my husband of how grateful I am for his support (dishwashing hands) and the down time he allows me, especially on weekends.
I’m overwhelmed. I need a nap! Actually, I really need exercise but the bed draws me more often than the walk, the weights or the swimming pool. I need a “mind” so that I don’t forget my keys or glasses as I rush out the door at 5:30am.


Doc visit last week reminded me that my own “forgetfulness” is probably exacerbated by aging (can’t change that), effects of anesthesia and surgery (can’t change that either) as well as stress and fatigue (3:15 am wakeups don’t help). Uh –hello, that list is not exactly an ah-ha moment, so what do I do about it. Doc rec was a good vitamin----which I forget to take ½ the time and cutting back. Where do you cut? I need more time and energy to minister to others. I’m too tired to even talk on the phone most nights. The One who is necessary, is NOT where I need to cut back but I am having to make creative adjustments and they don’t look very spiritual. I need to quit worrying about what the world sees (as if my testimony is of utmost importance) and only care about what God wants. His Goodness can get along without me. (Oh my---now there’s a thought that shouldn’t come as a shock.) God doesn’t need any of us but He delights in all of us. (Zephaniah 3:17)


Oh, He has given me glimpses of His grace all month---Michèle’s call, card & needle work reminders from HHS chum, pimento cheese, an encouraging blog comment, caring wise brothers, celebrations in Texas, Berlin UMC ‘s “Lord of the Dance” and timely e-mails. God’s way is glimpses of grace. I just happen to want gobs of grace and I want it yesterday. I want time. I want energy. I want it all and yet I can’t keep all those plates spinning. Sounds like too much of me and so little of Thee. How sad!
Once again I return to the juxtaposition of my human frailty and God’s strength. At this crossroad, I need to choose His power and give Him my limitations.
God Calling 1/23 entry “It (God’s power) is breathed in by the soul who lives in My Presence.”

This is the air I breathe
This is the air I breathe
Your holy Presence
Living in me

(Mercy Me, 2002)

For 3 weeks “Word and Prayer” have been my bookends. Even though limited, this time is vital. It’s just not what it was when I was in Dallas----I’m not in Dallas anymore and God has really had to protect my back side as I have returned to work with less mind, less strength and new demands. He has given me grace for one step at a time. Grace for today. I know that’s true. I lived it for an entire year. That’s what I need to remember.
The Zephaniah verse also says “The Lord your God is in your midst, a victorious warrior” (In Him, the war is already won.) and Romans 8:37 reminds me “…in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us.” 'Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,' says the LORD Almighty. (Zechariah 4:6)
So welcome to my "Sunday mind"----not one of warring but one of acceptance. Now I can leave the war room and go to the ballroom where I can dance. I want to dance!

U is for Understanding

1/20/09 Please grant understanding to me----my computer is at The Apple Store. I'll be back when it is back.