Q & A

2/25/09 You asked---I answered.
Church? First Evangelical---when he was 4, Josh called it “first of the van” and would lament the times he had to sit in the cemetery (sanctuary) maybe b/c he had to be quiet in there.
Favorite song for dancing/bopping---

“Ain’t too Proud to Beg” (Temptations) “I Can’t Help Myself” (Four Tops) I guarantee that if I hear those songs I start dancing even if it’s at “That Place on 98” near Apalachicola. Just ask embarrassed Larry.
Favorite Tea? Hard to narrow---I like a good assam---more of a black tea person than green tea. PG Tips (England) Red Rose (Canada) Bewley’s (Ireland) are in pantry now. Also love Jordan Pond tea (Maine) but I’m out, anyone going to the northeast??
Favorite book? Even harder to narrow but Keeper of the Bees, a real oldie (1925) by Gene Stratton-Porter stands out as a good one few folks have read. More recently read, Same Kind of Different as Me (Hall & Moore) and Shards of Shell, by “my” Michèle Phoenix.
Memorable Gift? Attending a mid-town home tour (1996) with Josh, I saw a French Limoges type porcelain box which had books on it and a Wordsworth sonnet quote---Larry & I had just been to WW’s home in Grasmere (Lake District in England) I loved it---from a distance---as it sat on an antique breakfront in one of the homes. I assume I mentioned it to Josh. A week later on my 50th birthday, I opened the beautifully wrapped Babcock’s gift from Larry and there it was! I was beside myself!! My mother was there and commented, “he probably paid $50 for that”---my thought was, I bet he wished that was all he paid. It’s still a gift I treasure. Diane surprising me on my 40th was a memorable “gift” as well.
Recent Memory? I have no recent memory---or not much anyway.
Big Surprise? “Grandmother” shower for me that I did not want---it was to be the month after Mother died, I didn’t want hoopla for me---kids needed the “stuff” not me---the surprise was that my dear friends brought the expectant parents & other grandparents from Texas along with my entire family from Kentucky to surprise me because I needed a “lift”---they showered me with love and I’ll never forget it. I’m crying just remembering the joy.
Travel Destination? For years, England was always the answer---these days home “feels so good” though I wouldn’t mind going to Germany so I could meet Michèle, whose faith and hope on her MacJourney keeps me hopeful.

Harder question but really the most important one (compilation of several) How do you keep on keeping on? It’s all about Him! I keep seeking His face. When I seek His face (Psalm 27:8) my heart is transformed and when my countenance reflects His peace it’s real, even if the tears are streaming.

As surgeries kept being put off, as new doctors bowed out and a team was being sought, I was faced with weeks of waiting. At the time, 4-6 more weeks seemed like a long time. But oh how I have needed that time both practically--- to deal with Larry’s folks and our dear neighbors and now my own dad’s diagnosis--- and emotionally and spiritually. I have needed time with Jesus.

Quiet times have been times of lingering---just being still in the Lord’s presence. Calming comes to mind. Meditation might begin in the early part of the day and then continue or be “refined” by the end of the day. Sometimes He brings affirmation of something learned at His feet through a friend’s comment, card, or e-mail.

One thing I know for sure---these times have been necessary for me to see my life with MAC, in the light of God’s goodness and truth. It has been a time of preparation for the spiritual battles that I encounter and even those yet to come. Some days l-o-n-g times with Him are NECESSARY (in all caps, for emphasis) to even hold my head up---but that’s when He becomes my shield and the lifter up of my head. (Psalm 3:3) It’s why I have never had to ask why?---that doesn’t matter, God’s glory does.

Kindness

2/24/09 “cuppa” kindness
Those who know me well, know that I like “sweet” tea with a big lemon wedge---none of that artificial stuff for me. But they also know that I am somewhat of a “hot” tea aficionado---maybe that accounts for all of those years of my love affair with England. Maybe that also accounts for all those years, as ljj reminded me recently, of serving a “cup of tea” to each student (1,000+) who came to the library during January---as a part of National Hot Tea Month. Of course, a good book was always part of the celebration and Mr. Putter and Tabby Pour the Tea was a favorite with the younger ones---and me too. 

I think I liked Mr. Putter b/c “he was old and his bones creaked” but he still took time each day to share his tea. He took his with sugar, Tabby took hers with cream and I take mine with both---actually preferring milk to cream, so it doesn’t overwhelm the tea flavor. (but never lemon for my "cuppa")

Prior to serving the tea, I’d make a big production of the tea tray and all the accouterments that made “taking tea” together so special. We discussed manners---sipping not slurping. Always, we talked about how special it was to sit and share with another person---an act of kindness of sorts---a way of saying I care about you enough to spend time with you.

In Grandaddy’s hospital room, I was jotting down these notes for the blog when a beautiful young nursing assistant in green scrubs came into the room to take care of his needs. I thought how familiar she looked to me----when you’ve been teaching 41 years, you see lots of familiar faces. Later I asked where she went to school. “Germantown.” I’m a Houston High gal so that didn't ring a bell, but then it “hit” me. “Did you go to Southwind Elementary?” I asked from behind my mask, which I have to wear anytime I'm at the hospital. “YES!” I reminded her that I was Mrs. Liles and the first words our of her mouth were, “You served me tea in the library! It had an orange taste and you made it just for us.”
Now over 10 years later, she’s returning the kindness to a member of my family as she cares for him and actually helps him sip his tea. We never know how our lives will impact someone else, but if kindness is involved, I think the benefit lasts a long time. Sadè is my proof.

In celebration, I’m having a “cuppa”--Jacksons of Piccadilly Darjeeeling--“the true classic of afternoon teas”--- in a my Queen’s china cup, with the pink rose design and looking up more kindness verses. As Michèle says, “Kindness is the fruit salad of spiritual gifts.”

Proverbs 31:26 She opens her mouth in wisdom, And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
Galatians 5:22,23 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.
Colossians 3:12 So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience;
Ephesians 4:32 Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.
2 Timothy 2:24 The Lord's bond-servant must not be quarrelsome, but be kind to all, able to teach, patient when wronged,

Impatient Patient

2/23/09 Patience for the “Patient” (Ashley B. said I needed some)
Yesterday was a “bummer” of a day in the feeling good department---and I didn’t know if it was just: A. fatigue, B. stress, C. a “bug” or D. All the above. (Teacher sounding, isn’t it)

But Dotsy----right there I should have inserted, But God…….but I didn’t---I didn’t wait on Him. I began “stewing,” knowing that Mommar would be spending the night and that I would be taking her to an 8 AM doctor’s appt. the next day. But God……….was faithful (& patient with me) and this morning when I needed a “window of health” to take her, I had it, so I donned my mask and off we went---even to collect urine specimens at home later---still working on collecting the “other.”

You see, I, Dotsy, wanted to feel better yesterday (no patience noted)---because I assumed that meant everything would be "right" (going my way) in preparation for the next day--- (I like to be prepared) ----(spell check thought maybe I needed “Ditsy”for Dotsy and I think that might be a good choice b/c I need to get my head on straight in area of trust/waiting)

Journal jottings about patience:
Streams in the Desert, Feb. 21 (I was doing some catch up reading)
If I’m not waiting in the “right” way it can remove me from the right place----the place where the Lord can meet me.
Patience eliminates worry. His promise = His Presence.
Patience eliminates weeping. He knows my needs better than I.
Patience eliminates works---(self-works variety)
Patience eliminates all “want.” Check desire here—do I want what I want or do I want God’s will?
Patience eliminates all weakness. Waiting is not wasted time—God is preparing resources & strengthening me. (for today--Boy, did He ever!)
Patience eliminates all wobbling. God’s foundation is steady & His patience, within me, makes me steady.
Patience yields worship! Praiseful waiting=worship.

Colossians 1:11 (a verse I often pray for others)
We also pray that you will be strengthened with all his glorious power so you will have all the endurance and patience you need. May you be filled with joy, (Or all the patience and endurance you need with joy) (New Living Translation)

While waiting, Ditsy Dotsy, let (all these aspects of) patience have its perfect result, that you may be complete, lacking in nothing. (James 1:4—NASB)

Solemn Sunday

2/22/09 Assignment: Obituary
When you’ve attended 3 “final events,” in a week’s time, that include a memorial service, a graveside service, and a visitation, for three different people, you have reason to pause and reflect. On the stone markings of the grave are reminders of three things, two of which we have absolutely no control over.

One of the people, who passed away will have a headstone that will read 1946-2009. She was born in 1946, as was I, and many of my Hopkinsville High School pals. She had no control over that birth date nor the day which she died………….but God---“ for Thou didst weave me in my mother’s womb………..Thy eyes have seen my unformed substance; and in Thy book were written all the days that were ordained for me, when as yet there was not one of them.” (Psalm 139 13-16) What she and the other 2 women, whose services I attended, had control over----just as you and I do, is the dash between those 2 dates.

This is not a new thought with me---sermons have been preached for years on this topic, I’m sure. We might not control our birth and death but we certainly have control over the choices we make in between those pre-ordained times. 

How about you? Are you making the right choices in “your dash”---the only part of your life that you are responsible for. Who are you “dancing” with? What kind of legacy are you leaving? That’s your obituary---the one that will be written on the hearts of people who matter in your life.

Micah 5:8 is a reminder for me. “He has told you, O man, what is good; And what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?”

The Good Book

2/21/09 His Word
K-Love radio chat yesterday discussed unusual words and "bibliophobia" (a fear of running out of books to read) was one of them. I on the other hand tend more toward the “so many books so little time” philosophy. However, the writer of Ecclesiastes reminds us of the futility of this and issues a warning: “the writing of many books is endless, and excessive devotion to books is wearying to the body.” Sometimes too much of anything ---even pleasure---can be overwhelming and take it’s toll. So in the reading area, I need to choose carefully---and except for my devotional journal, My Utmost for His Highest, I rarely ever read a book twice. (Wonder if Jesus Calling will be added to that list?) In years past, (each January) when I thought I had some semblance of control/order in my life, I would read, Disciplines of a Beautiful Woman by Anne Ortlund and Anne Morrow Lindbergh’s, Gift From the Sea ----sort of a resolution to “do better” ritual. Both were small books so I could read them before returning to teaching. Both were also gifts from college chums who were Pi Phi sorority sisters as well. I had forgotten that part until I went searching my bookshelf, after typing the above remembrance, and saw the inscription. Maureen has since died but Molly’s driving over from Blytheville next week for a lunch/visit.

I searched b/c didn’t want to highlight books that I haven’t read in awhile, plus, I wanted to revisit the “draw” of those two particular books. Maybe the “draw” was that the both writings gave inspiration to a “growing Christian” who as a wife, mother of three and a working woman, wanted to “do it” right. The Ortlund book was easy reading and easily became a checklist for a “works mentality” kind of gal----the hubby/family, the schedule, the clothes and the spiritual life as well. The somewhat splattered copy of “Gift…” included marginalia and it was easy to reread some key passages. It might have been written in the 50s but it sounded a lot like today’s world. Her writing is gentle and reads like poetry and it was easy to be drawn to the passages that “spoke” to me almost 30 years ago----though AML’s own life was not “perfect” by any means.

On p. 23, Lindbergh states, "I would like to achieve a state of inner spiritual grace from which I could function and give as I was meant to in the eye of God." A couple of pages later she adds, "What a circus act we women perform every day of our lives. It puts the trapeze artist to shame."

I would have to reread it all closely to see how it aligns with scripture but there are certainly some statements that ring true that I had underlined.
Underlinings from Gift from the Sea:
• They (other women) manage….. far better than I, it seemed to me, looking at their lives from the outside. (My marginalia—never compare your insides with someone’s else’s outsides----that’s an adage I often share)
• Woman---the eternal nourisher of society----gives & gives….sometimes spilling away in driblets….seldom being allowed the time, the quiet, the peace, to …..fill up to the brim.
• A tree has significance if one sees it against the empty face of sky. A note in music gains significance from the silence on either side.
• Perhaps we never appreciate the here and now until it is challenged.

With those thoughts--I’m okay with the fact that I am desiring lots of quiet interludes and am seeking times of silence and solitude lately. But….as I’m choosing to be still and know that He is Lord, I want to be filled to the brim with more of Him. With that in mind, I want to open the one Book that I choose above all others because, Thy Word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path. (Psalm 119:105)

Words---Lexiteria

2/20/09 Lexiteria Liles Style
Posted late today because both phone and internet have been down---maybe that was God’s hand---setting me apart for meditation.

Brother Buddy is a lexicologist, son Buddy is a wordsmith and lately I (who have similar genes) struggle with finding just the right words ---especially in this “cobweb” brain of mine. Now, I am concerned about words (notice I didn’t put worried or fretting---I know they are no-nos)----words that might come out of my mouth while I’m drug induced for these surgeries. Sitting with my father-in-law at the hospital, after he’s had to have procedures that require more morphine, and hearing the “babble” that comes from his mouth makes me uncomfortable. I certainly have my share of character flaws, but to date, foul language has never been one of them. People who know me well and even the students at school, make fun of my strong language-----
lawzie-beezie, dear gussie, what in the sam hill, tootberries, I suhwanee,
oy vey & a few other Yiddish expressions are about as profane as I get----but what if I lose my manners while under the influence of all those surgery drugs and babble all the “bleep” words I’ve ever heard in my entire life? Remember, my prayer request has been, “Lord don’t let my actions/behavior during this MAC season overshadow (in any way) Your goodness.” How much goodness will people see if my mouth is filled with #@**/!

Okay, let’s talk about meaningful words. Words are important to me, especially from scripture. One of my all time favorite verses is Jeremiah 15:16. Thy words were found and I ate them, and Thy words became for me a joy and the delight of my heart.

Lately I’ve been devouring them---and you now know that’s scriptural. Some have asked what kind of Bible I have? I’m assuming they mean version although there are a variety of study Bibles. For Bible study, I use the New American Standard Version (NASB) for memorizing, much has been done with the King James Version (KJV) ---you know all those Thees & Thous & haths---and for nightly reading Larry uses either a New International Version or more recently the English Standard Version (ESV) which he recently bought at DTS in Dallas to read aloud verses folks have sent to me that day. Those translations flow well when reading.

Compare the versions of Psalm 37:3 Trust in the LORD, and do good; Dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness. (NASB)
Trust in the LORD, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed. (KJV)

Same verse, different version, often gives me a little more insight ---however I’m no Hebrew expert so I ask the Bible Study Fellowship questions: what does it say ?; what does it mean?; and what does this mean to me? This particular verse means to me that I can take a verse of scripture and meditate on it, feed on it, throughout the day---to me, it’s as if when I am trusting in Him, I am “feeding on faithfulness” His faithfulness and His truths as I apply them to my life.
If I want to go for additional commentary I use
http://www.soniclight.com/constable/notes.htm
Dr. Constable is a DTS professor who is a reliable source.

Wow if I have any readers after this didactic entry, I’ll know you are stout of heart----or maybe you too want to truly feed on God’s Word.

Sherry

2/19/09 In Loving Memory of Sherry Fries Kaplan

Loving & faithful wife, loving & caring mother,
loving & generous grandmother
astute businesswoman,“ spark” of Longreen,

How do you put into words the special relationship that comes from living next door to someone for 32 years----being concise is difficult when trying to encapsulate such a relationship. Those early years were shared with kids and all that encompasses; the middle years included her girls’ bat mitzvahs, weddings and eventually grandchildren. Then the “picking up the slack” phase (mail, garbage, paying each other’s bills was always Jerome’s joke) began as both families began to travel more, in part, because each of us had a child/children who moved out of state. Plus, Sherry loved cruises and Las Vegas.

The latter years were spent on one or the other’s patios, especially the summer following her pancreatic cancer diagnosis. She was amazing---for 2 ½ years during her final season of life, she did all the doctors prescribed and yet worked those treatments around really important “life” events----attending both grandsons’ bar mitzvahs and even taking them to Israel this past December---what a way to spend your last Hanukkah!

Her final weeks we spent in her den sharing memories—and the fellowship that comes when 2 people are on the same side of the cancer struggle. The final days were spent on the phone as she would call to check on me---what a gal!

The final goodbye came standing behind her wheelchair waiting on the EMTs to load her in the ambulance. I was stroking her hair and holding a pillow by her head for comfort as she answered, “Larry and Dotsy” to their question, “who do you see here” ----how grateful I am for that moment of coherence before they took her to the hospital for the final time.

I will continue to pray the prayer for Sherry’s family that she took to Israel for me to be put in the Western Wall/ Wailing Wall (thanks, Jerome)---it’s from the prophet, Isaiah.
Look unto me and be saved, all the ends of the earth;
For I am God and there is no other.

You will be sorely missed, my friend.

MORNING SONG

2/18/09 Good Morning
It’s a new day and I plan to rejoice and be glad in it. (Psalm 118:24)
Lamentations 3 says it well:
22The LORD'S lovingkindnesses indeed never cease,
For His compassions never fail.
23They are new every morning;
Great is Your faithfulness.

So, to enjoy this new morn, indeed, I’ll have a “cuppa”----Royal Blend, I think. It’s one of my favorite tea blends---it’s a Fortnum and Mason variety and can be tricky to find. My first introduction to it was when visiting the FM London store---and being led in on the first floor by the doorman in the “frock-coat.” After that last trip in 2002, I was able to get it at Leaf & Bean in Park Slope, Brooklyn when visiting son, Josh, but no more---- only found stateside now at SAKS. But I found it!

All of that to say, this “cuppa of the day” is special and a great accompaniment to my time with Him---a time of soul restoration. (Psalm 25:3) Plus, just as the Fortnum Mason brand has ties to royalty, so do I. I am a child/daughter of the King.

But you are A CHOSEN RACE, A ROYAL PRIESTHOOD, A HOLY NATION, A PEOPLE FOR God's OWN POSSESSION, so that you may proclaim the excellencies of Him who has called you out of darkness into His marvelous light; (1 Peter 2:9)

I Peter 2:1-3 says, Putting aside all……long for the pure milk of the word………grow…….if (since is better translation) you have tasted the kindness of the Lord.
As I sip my tea and reflect on this, I realize that in the midst of an upcoming busy day, I will have to intentionally listen for His voice, which is music to my ears. How else will I block out the cacophony of the urgent that whirls around me?? That’s why this beginning time with Him is so important---a time of tuning out all but one sound for awhile---to listen to the sound from the One who speaks truth, learned at His feet and can whisper it in His still small voice or hum it in my ear as we dance throughout this new day.

Then at the end of the day, I hope that I will be able to see my day, as a day offered to Him as an acceptable spiritual sacrifice. (I Peter 2: 5)

(Can you tell my son is preaching from I Peter this month?)
Have a “cuppa” with the King, and enjoy your day---that’s just what I intend to do!

EARS TO HEAR

2/17/09 Ears that Hear
I’m thinking blogging might be very short tonight---it’s been an extremely difficult and emotionally taxing last 48 hours dealing with family issues---poor health and aging can be tough on everyone.
Give ear to my words, O LORD, Consider my groaning. (Psa. 5:1) I don’t how much I verbalized but my body was groaning with the weight of circumstances that truly aren’t even mine---I just care about those involved and feel so helpless. I know God hears—Scripture validates that.
The eyes of the LORD are toward the righteous, And His ears are open to their cry. Psa. 34:15
O LORD, You have heard the desire of the humble; You will strengthen their heart, You will incline Your ear ….Psalm 10: 17
But what about listening----do I have ears to hear---it seems so hard right now.
So here’s the assignment---what does God’s word say about listening/heeding?

BTW, Psalm 34 (which Larry read to me last night) validates not only the truth that God hears but He cares and takes action on our behalf.
17 The righteous cry, and the LORD hears
And delivers them out of all their troubles.
18 The LORD is near to the brokenhearted
And saves those who are crushed in spirit.
19 Many are the afflictions of the righteous,
But the LORD delivers him out of them all.

Okay, I feel better, just tired, so I’m going to bed and leave the homework to the “students.”
Nite, I love you as all the Liles say!

Hearing/Heeding

2/16/09 Meditating on hearing/heeding----
My obsessive self-control (ar) showed itself again on Valentine’s Day, as I felt I could only write in my journals, if I had a red pen-----so I used one-----I wrote----I felt better, and silly, at the same time. A lot of V-Day was spent at the hospital with Grandaddy so I didn’t have lots of time for reading until almost “lights out” time, when I’m usually way past any point of comprehension ability. I read My Utmost for His Highest entry for that day and I’ve reread it every day since.

"What I tell you in darkness, that speak ye in light: and what ye hear in the ear, that preach ye upon the housetops." Matthew 10:27

"At times God puts us through the discipline of darkness to teach us to heed Him. Songbirds are taught to sing in the dark, and we are put into the shadow of God's hand until we learn to hear Him." (need ears to hear, Dotsy) "What I tell you in darkness"---watch where God puts you into darkness, and when you are there keep your mouth shut." (Docs are taking care of that part---sewing it shut for a couple of weeks---maybe I can learn before then and that procedure won’t be needed.)
"Are you in the dark just now in your circumstances, or in your life with God? Then remain quiet. If you open your mouth in the dark, you will talk in the wrong mood: darkness is the time to listen…….but, listen and heed………..hear what God is saying. When you are in the dark, listen, and God will give you a very precious message for someone else when you get into the light."
The teacher in me senses an “Assignment: Ears” coming down the pike. Hard to believe it’s been 42 years since that first teaching job at Richland Elementary as J. Cawthorn’s afternoon kindergarten aide----my main impetus being financial gain ---$50 a month. I wanted to earn “spending money” for my first European tour w/ the Memphis State Art Dept. $$ has always been an area where the Lord has had to be patient with me---slow learner here. But God………Why do you spend money for what is not bread, and your wages for what does not satisfy? Listen carefully to me and eat what is good, and delight yourself in abunDANCE. Incline your ear & come to Me. Listen that you may live; (Isaiah 55: 2-3)

I'm glad that today I backed off of “perfection” and sought a quietude of sorts---that calm, peacefulness that comes from Him---whether in the solitude, that I seem to require great amounts of lately, or in the midst of life’s bustle----that usually can only occur after I’ve had time in the Word----then it’s an overflow of sorts. I plan to mediate on "listen that you may live" ---because with me living doesn't count unless it's done with Him----that's why I equate living/life with dancing----He's always alongside----maybe if I'll listen close enough I'll hear Him humming our song.