FORGIVENESS = CONTENTMENT!

Father forgive my "whine" within. Even when I don't voice it, I know it's there. May it not be!

Today is "Thankful Thursday," a great time to "trash the whine" and give thanks.....in everything! (I Thessalonians 5:18)

May my life manifest the Spirit of God within. 

Contentment ..........Christ in me the hope of glory is seen as I live in the light of His forgiveness!

Thank God I'm Forgiven!.....................

                    not just on Thursday, but everyday!

ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE

11/12/13 Though fall was recognized officially on our calendars seven weeks ago, recent temps felt like summer was still holding its breath, not completely giving over to those cooler temps of autumn. But...oh my goodness, this morning it felt as if both summer and fall joined in a collective inhalation of any warmth that was left in our atmosphere. A resulting exhalation of cold, gusty breath took our portion of the mid-South right into winter temps.

United States Army, est. 1775. Daddy served under that flag in WWII.

I noticed because I was trying to take a picture outside* on this gusty day. A day that moved from  a"freeze watch" to "hard freeze warning" in a matter of hours. Uncomfortable? Somewhat.
Earlier on my errand runs,  I noticed I was sliding into the "complaint" mode, along with many folks around me. I even like the fact that I live in an area that actually has seasonal changes, so what would be my complaint? Is complaint contagious?

But God....reminded me of I Thessalonians 5:18, "in everything give thanks..." How dare me (or anyone) to take umbrage at a drop in temps, seeing it as unjust if it inconveniences us and our comfort. Imagine how such carping would be viewed in the Philippines. 

A thankful heart. A grateful spirit. A change of attitude.

Would gratitude be equally contagious? Why can't it start with me?

A day in the life of.....

4/12/12 A day in the life of…..a grandmother with a sad heart. This entry sounds like it’s going downhill----but God…………had me open my Jesus Calling yesterday (3/11) after I kissed loved ones good-by. The first line read, “This is the day I have made, Rejoice and be glad in it.” So I began the day being careful NOT to complain (that would be my natural tendency) about the long distance from 6 of my grands. Focusing instead on thanking the Lord for the time I had been given.

Was it easy? Not exactly. Was it right? Yes. In everything give thanks. (I Thessalonians 5:18)

As the day worn on, regardless of a great walk with Ellen and a schedule change allowing a haircut with Pam (thus a long car ride chat w/ Bernie) I fell back into sadness.

But God……..does not give up on teaching me obedience. As I pulled out the egg carton for a dinner recipe, there in the top was another reminder---Psalm 118:24. It was stamped right on the inside of the carton. I couldn’t help but smile on my gifts of the day.

Has Aldi® always stamped egg cartons with a verse? I don’t recall seeing them before.

Mammography Misery

7/7/11 Sitting in the waiting area of the Methodist Healthcare Breast Center, I was struggling with both fear and dread. "I know~ I know!" "In everything give thanks"(I Thessalonians 5:18) and that would include mammograms. I am grateful for this early detection, possibly life saving procedure. What I'm struggling with is past memories of the pain brought on by that tall, COLD, stainless pancake machine with the acrylic "flattener."

But God....had the receptionist hand me a "pile" of forms to fill out with the important stuff highlighted in pink. Forms to keep me "in the pink." Pink highlights to remind me that I use pink when I want to display text in my reading that has prayer references. I even had my pink highlighter with me, clipped to my "A Praying Life" book---already full of "pink." A gentle tap to remind me to pray.

I entered waiting area #3 (diagnostic side) in a spa-type robe, chosen over the dreaded hospital gown---thankful for a choice. The exam, though not exactly painless only required one "repeat" and was relatively quick for 8 views. I was then relegated to waiting area #4 until results were read and I could leave---depending on said results.

So....then I began to worry because it was done so quickly. Had the tech been thorough? (I forgot my thankful prayer for "speed" in this procedure.)
God covered that and had tech call me back for 2 ultrasounds. Dotsy wants thorough, Dotsy gets thorough! (and wet and time consuming and uncomfortable) Doctor reading results said "the girls" looked okay and she'd see me in a year.

A Germantown fire truck followed by an ambulance arrived as I was heading out the door. There are miseries worse than mammograms and I began to pray for the person that was getting ready to take that ride.

LADDER OF COMPLAINT

4/11/11

Such a title might seem like a typo of sorts since most often we hear of “letters of complaint.” The CA Letters to the Editor column has certainly had more than enough of them about teachers lately. This title is correct----it’s a reflection of my morning’s Jesus Calling marginalia.

Through the years I’ve been taught to take all of your struggles and complaints to the Lord. Anne Graham Lotz even suggested writing them out on paper and balling them up to physically rid yourself of them as you “metaphorically” leave them at the Lord’s feet for Him to handle.

“Begin this day with open hands of faith, ready to receive all that I am pouring into this brief potion of your life. Be careful not to complain about anything,…..” (Jesus Calling, 4/11) After reading that I jotted a list and underlined each complaint. The list began to look like a ladder----each rung going downward. I realized that my complaints do just that. They are like a ladder leading down to a “pit”---more specifically a “pity pit.”

The best way to change that direction is through thankfulness. That’s scriptural so I plan to “think” on that today.

"In everything give thanks for this is the will of God concerning you." (I Thessalonians 5:18)

What’s the will of God concerning you? (and me) That in everything we give thanks.

I think I need to change my ladder of complaint for one of contentment----one that’s “upward” bound----that’s the way to stay out of the pit.

6But godliness with contentment is great gain. 7 For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. 8 But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. (I Timothy 6:6-8)

SHOW CANCELED

2/25/11

That’s what the sign taped to the door said. Disappointment. Having a production cancelled is not the end of the world……but it’s still disappointing. I had arranged everything---yea, right. Guess who is not in charge of the world? I had so wanted to have the perfect time with my T-Cup friends by treating them (thanks to HF) to dinner and G’town Community Theatre’s production of Dixie Swim Club, which focuses on the friendship of 5 women that spanned 33 years. The blurb says---their lives unfold, the years pass, these women increasingly rely on one another, through advice and repartee, to get through all those challenges life flings at them….as they rally around each other with strength and love—a hilarious and touching comedy about friendships that last forever.”

Disappointments over shows/plans cancelled are a part of life---and in the scheme of things, I know this was not major. Yet, I felt bad for them and they probably felt bad for me---because we had really looked forward to sharing this “event” together.

I had to ask myself once again. What are the life lessons in this?

Immediately I Thessalonians 5:18 came to mind. “In everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

Thank you, Lord----

· for a hubby who helped “prepare” house for “company,”

· for friends who finish setting a table & find the glasses because I completely forgot to put them out,

· for “watched & unwatched” bread that didn’t burn, for friends to remind me to serve said bread---halfway through the meal,

· time to share a meal with friends, times to celebrate over births, baptisms, successful surgeries & anticipation of more grandchildren, time to grieve a parent’s terminal diagnosis,

· friends to listen & advise about challenges with economy,

· safety from unknown reasons as a theatre is renovated at the "last" minute

Shows/plans canceled are a part of life---but they’re not an end all---they can just be an opportunity to thank God and to be joyfully expectant for Act 2 or Plan B.

Saying Good-by

7/26/09
Awash with emotion. It’s always this way with me when I give and receive goodbye hugs and kisses, especially those slobbery ones from the babies. When immediate family is spread from Tennessee to Texas and New York there are very few times when we’re all together at once. Maybe that’s why I struggle with this mixed bag of emotions. It’s a grieving of sorts that comes with separation from loved ones.

I’m sitting on the balcony of the beach house we rent each year the third week in July, knowing that even that scheduling regularity doesn’t always ensure 100% attendance. Sitting with me is my mixed bag of emotions----believe me, it’s pretty big! It’s especially big right now because two Suburbans full of Texans just left followed by the Memphis trio. NYC twosome and Larry are easing into their day with coffee and I’m out here feeling so sad and somewhat left behind. Just wait ‘til I put Josh & Megan on the plane---I get a lump in my throat just thinking about it. On a good year, Uncle Josh and Megan join us at the beach and then Larry and I will usually see him one other time. From a mom’s point of view, that’s not enough.

Then poor Larry is stuck with me for the 9 hour drive home where I try to deal with these feelings. Sometimes that means I try not to “feel” because it hurts----remember, I know how to do the avoiDANCE when it comes to feelings. Sometimes these repressed emotions seem to explode when other of life’s circumstances (often unrelated) bring these feelings to a head. Today I’m praying that the Lord will grant insight from these emotions.

Right now the clouds are rolling in and covering the beach. There’s even lightning on the horizon. Somehow that darkness and thunder that follows the lightning seems to reflect my mood---it’s covering me over with shadows of gloom. The lump in my throat is constricting and my eyes are filling with tears. It seems that we have so little time together and the week goes by so-o-o fast. There seems to be so much felt and so little said---just not enough time to say it all. Even at the beach the tyranny of the “urgent” (feeding, pottying, and napping) can rob us of time.

But God……this week showed me that those urgencies do not necessarily rob me of joy. All that cooking and bathing and reading to the boys was pure joy. That’s where my wandering thoughts began to go as my emotional roller coaster slowed enough to allow me to see the abundance of blessings I had received during the week. (In everything give thanks; I Thess. 5:18) Watching John Parker go from a few timid steps to walking from one room to the next, helping Noah use an old timey egg beater to make chocolate shakes for all the boys, hearing Caleb’s account of learning to snorkel with Pop-Pop, digitally capturing Nathan’s triathlon challenge with Uncle Josh and hearing Owen squeal with delight as he chased his cousins. It was just the ordinary stuff of families who share love. Without the love there wouldn’t be all this hurt. God has shown me that love and pain are not mutually exclusive. They can indeed occur at the same time.

Am I blessed? Yes!! Is my heart aching? Yes!!

My journal is now smudged with tears along with John Parker’s scribbles and when I take this home to type on the computer it will take longer than usual because he also rearranged my “shift” key. Will I be angry? No, but it will probably make me cry as I’m beginning to realize that it’s okay to love and hurt at the same time---that’s why it’s so hard to say good-by. 

So, I’ll just say, “Nite, I love you,” because that’s the Liles way to show love at the end of the day, even if we’re miles apart.