No. 2

11/9/10 The ubiquitous yellow No. 2. These pencils continue to be a standard in education. At the high school level, their main purpose seems to be in the test-taking realm. TCAP, ACT and other standardized tests require them. Exams and end of course tests that are scored using Scantrons still use them---maybe because the softer lead/graphite makes erasure easier.

Just yesterday, Tootsie sent me an e-mail with pencil art. I didn’t see any author so I can’t give credit but some really sharp pencil points were given. (Just had to throw that in because y’all know how I love my pencil points to be extra sharp!) Read and determine for yourself the spiritual implications of the analogy.

5 Important lessons for Pencils of Purpose

1. REMEMBER, EVERYTHING YOU DO WILL LEAVE A MARK.
2. YOU CAN ALWAYS CORRECT THE MISTAKES YOU MAKE .
3. WHAT’S IMPORTANT IS WHAT IS INSIDE OF YOU.

4. IN LIFE, YOU WILL UNDERGO PAINFUL SHARPENINGS, WHICH WILL ONLY MAKE YOU BETTER.
5. TO BE THE BEST PENCIL, YOU MUST ALLOW YOURSELF TO BE HELD AND GUIDED BY THE HAND THAT HOLDS YOU.

As most of my readers know, I am constantly sharpening pencils, especially in times of stress. It’s just so therapeutic for me. However, I need to cease striving and like the good ole No. 2, allow the Hand that guides my life to hold me and use me for His purpose.

Plan A to Plan B to Plan C and so on...

11/8/10 I would say I’m already to Plan S this month but last week even that

"plan" didn’t work. My new “hold on to your mind” plan seemed to be a “bust.” In the night, every time I would awaken, I’d remind myself, 3 Ss---don’t forget. Swimsuit. Sympathy card. Salad dressing. Half way down the street, headed to work----Oh no, I forgot my swimsuit with the sympathy card right on top of it. Turnaround required. Arrived at work at 5:35 am and all was good “til I went to put away my lunch goodies and I don’t even have the salad dressing. So much for Plan S.

I do know the basics of the best plan for my memory struggle. I need to D.A.N.C.E. through it. However, the steps for this dance seem somewhat complicated, especially when I feel silly asking for inane things like recovering lost/misplaced items (though I did find the black bathing suit)

Regardless of how I “feel” I need to continue to call out to Him. That’s His plan for me. You probably need that as well. Therefore, think on these verses today.

Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you. (Jeremiah 29:12)

Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and show thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not. (Jeremiah 33:3)

AWARENESS

11/3/10
Sometimes I feel as if I’m walking in a fog, or worse yet, driving in a fog. That is a scary thought----because I’ll look up (become aware of) where I am and wonder how I got there, since I have no recollection of passing familiar landmarks.

Have you ever felt that you’re on the threshold of something, you’re just not sure what? Am I entering or exiting? Coming or going? Often my threshold feels more like a revolving door, one without an exit. I just keep going around.

I can’t seem to recall those things I try so hard to remember. This is day 3 of my work week and I have yet to remember to bring Sunday’s Chinese leftovers for lunch. (At this point, I think I’ve missed a “use by” expiration date.) Even this morning coming in to work I realized I had picked up my swim bag rather than my book bag? On the other hand those things, I wish I could forget will creep back in as those “if onlys” whir around my mind, robbing me of my joy.

What is happening to the threshold of my mind? Is it A. aging, B. stress, or C. distraction? Maybe answer D----all of the above. The big question is what do I do about it? I don’t have a clue.
But God…………..gave me the word mindful.

Test me, LORD, and try me, examine my heart and my mind; for I have always been mindful of your unfailing love and have lived in reliance on your faithfulness. (Psalm 26:2-3)

I just need to be mindful of Him and trust His faithfulness for my “awareness.” Maybe that way I will focus on what’s important, let some things go and see the rest as opportunities to “communicate more with Him.” (S. Young, Jesus Calling 11/3)

God's Answer

11/2/10………for Hannah Helen Hasslen is “Hannah’s home in heaven.” Early this morning Larry told me our son, Buddy, called last night with news of Hannah’s death. I felt punched in the stomach, sad all over, and at the same time grateful for God’s mercy. Just yesterday I had cried out to the Lord for mercy for that sweet little girl and an extra measure of grace for the family. Death was God’s answer.

Though death seems like a hard answer, God's goodness was evident as Hannah spent her last 3 nights at home. Doctor Hannah was able to see some folks, trick or treat (briefly) alongside her brother, Iron Jake, in a wagon & then have the best night’s sleep of the last month---in her own home. Sunday night did not bode so well as nausea and pain resumed along with anxiety of returning to the hospital. Monday’s plan was to take her to the American Doll store to look for a Ruth doll on the way back to the hospital for her noon appointment---as I understand it Hannah was never “fully” readmitted to the hospital but was sitting quietly in the transfusion area with her mom and dad as they stroked her hair when, as her father said, “it was as if the Lord just swooped in and took her home.”

Last “tweets” from the family that give insight into her final day.

November 1 Updates:

• 7:24 a.m. From best to worst! Han & Amy had rough night with no sleep! Han nauseated all night---anxiety about going back to hospital today. (Remember the night before had been best night of sleep in over 1 month! Thank you Jesus!)
  
• 1:03 p.m. Need prayers for Han! Very sick in doctors office! All main blood tests came back worse! Jesus - we need You now!!
• 1:39 pm Waiting for dr. on next steps. Giving her fluids, blood & anti nausea meds. Prob readmit to hospital. Should feel better soon.
• 5:30 p.m. Update - doctors had decided to let Hannah go home after blood but then Han had crazy reaction. She's being admitted to hospital.
• Tonight @6pm, Hannah Helen Hasslen passed away & went home to the Lord! Her death was unexpected, sudden, peaceful and without pain.

11:01 pm We would like to thank everyone for their outpouring of prayers, support & love given to Hannah in her last days and to our entire family!

Hannah’s parents have requested that her service be a testimony to the character of God and a celebration of Hannah’s life. Also, in lieu of flowers, gifts could be given to the Samaritan's Purse - Operation Christmas Child because “Han loved filling those shoeboxes.” They have asked that the song “Majesty” be sung as that’s the song they sung over her when she was born.

Majesty, worship His Majesty 

Unto Jesus, be all glory,
Power and praise 

Majesty, Kingdom authority 

Flow from His throne, 
Unto his own, His anthem raise. 

So exalt,
lift up on high
The Name of Jesus

Magnify, come glorify,

Christ Jesus the King

Majesty, worship His Majesty 

Jesus who died, now glorified,

King of all Kings.

Hannah Helen Hasslan was God’s answer to a young couple’s prayers and now, though heart broken, her parents accept God’s answer as His best for Hannah and look forward with great hope to the day they will see her again.

F.A.I.T.H.

Focusing
All
I
Think
Heavenward

Saturday as opened my devotional book, (My Utmost for His Highest) a square of rich, linen writing paper fell out. Jeremiah 24:6-7 was written out on it. Mary Flo had given it to me last October 30. It's the reminder of her prayer for some folks whom I dearly love.

6 My eyes will watch over them for their good, and I will bring them back to this land. I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. 7 I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the LORD. They will be my people, and I will be their God, for they will return to me with all their heart.

Today as I meditated on this passage, I prayed those verses for them as well. Is there anyone in your life that you desire to pray, " God give them a heart to know You, that You are Lord?
Do you believe God for the answer? Do you ever struggle with that? Oswald Chambers (10/30 entry) states: that faith is boundless.

I'm struggling, so I'm focusing all I think heavenward---about this scripture as a prayer for those I love) Won't you join me in continuing to pray in boundless faith?

Diversi—TEA

10/28/10 As I set my tea cup on the counter this morning, it was reflected in my framed birthday card from Ashley B.
There is probably no one more diverse in my life than my dear friend, Ashley Bryan. Ashley doesn’t “talk the talk,” Ashley “walks the walk” and is without a doubt one of the kindest folks I have ever known.
So why the diversi—TEA nomenclature? We differ in gender--he’s a he. We differ in age. We're a generation apart. During WWII, before I was even born, he kept a sketch pad in his gas mask. We differ in race. His African roots come by way of Harlem & an Antigua ancestry. We differ in culture---even his home today is on a small island and his passion is preserving the folktales and spirituals of his roots. We differ in experience---his would take pages to list, mine not so much. We differ in distinction. He’s recognized in the art world and literary world with national and international awards under his belt---numerous Coretta Scott King awards, the 2009 Laura Ingalls Wilder medal from ALA for for substantial and lasting contributions to children's literature. In 2008 Ashley was recognized with S. Rushdie, E. Albee, and Nora Ephron as an NYC Literary Lion.

Ashley is all the above and so much more and yet he has been my friend regardless of the differences. One of his book inscriptions reads, "we be family." Together we embrace diversity.

For Molly’s 21st birthday he invited us to Isleford to steam fresh lobster. (her favorite food) He showed her his stained glass works of the 4 apostles made from sea glass & helped her make papier-mâché. He’s met Larry and stayed in our home. He met son, Buddy when he was in Dallas for the opening of the African American Art Museum. He met son, Josh when he was accepting the Society of American Illustrators lifetime achievement award in New York City. He meets up with me at literary conferences and introduces me to the “biggies,” somewhat oblivious that he is a biggie himself. Together we celebrate diversity.

A picture graces my wall that he painted because it “sang out to him of Dotsy.” If you ever check Ashley out on wikipedia, you’ll see him standing in front of a similar work. When he couldn’t make it to Dallas during my October ’09 surgery, he wrote a letter explaining the change. Later he called to check on me. That, my friends, is diversity at it’s finest.

It is truth practiced in love and should be the “color of our spiritual life” regardless of the color of our skin. Abounding love approves those things which are excellent and glorify the God we serve. (Philippians 1: 9-11)

Thanks Ashley for living out those lessons of diversi—TEA for me.

Divinit---TEA

10/27/10 If you want to taste and see that the Lord is good, (Psalm 34:7) this is the "tea" for you. Just look around you.

Though it's been almost 2 years since I began my cancer journey with MAC, it was exactly 1 year ago today that I embarked on what was to be my final surgery. Technically I had 5 surgeries prior to this, not counting biopsies, but it was not Dr. Ha's desire for this to be the last one. He felt that I needed 2 more to complete the reconstruction of my face so that he and I would both be more pleased with the symmetry.

Some of those events still stand out but the ones that stand out the most are the “but God….events” (Ephesians 2:4) those where God in His goodness and mercy clearly showed me His hand in my life. That’s why I continue to record each day the “Seeing God’s Hand” events on my blog.

As my life after the BIG cancer events returned more to a normal routine, I didn’t want to over look the divine. I wanted my world to still be filled with Him, the divine One……….to continue to see divinity everywhere, even in the daily events. Events so filled with God as to spur me to thanksgiving and worship. Events as simple as sitting in newly painted red Adirondacks, sipping a cup of tea* and watching the leaves fall on my patio.

*Basic chai, a strongly brewed black tea diluted with milk & traditionally consumed hot and sweet, is the perfect tea for such a divine event. Thus, Divini---TEA!

Royal--TEA

10/25/10 Fortnum & Mason’s Royal Blend is an appropriate “cuppa” choice for a child of the king. It’s also one of my favorites. However, according to my somewhat faded notes of July 2, 2003, my “cuppa” was somewhat weak---1 tea bag with 8 oz. water and 1 ½ t. sugar (nowadays I use more sugar & less milk) and 2 T of milk didn’t cut it. (I don’t use cream or half-and-half because it tends to mask the tea flavor.) Needed more umph. At 7:15, following my quiet time, I took a second cup brewed w/ F & M loose tea to the patio along with the food section of the Wednesday Commercial Appeal and found the stronger taste more to my liking, even though it was already 73° outside. Plus, I carried with me the teaching of scripture for the rest of the day.

I did feel like royalty that morning. Summer schedules have a way of doing that for teachers. I had time for a “cuppa” with my Father, the King of Kings---that’s really royal—TEA.

I will be a Father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty. (2 Corinthians 6:18)

Live like royalty today. Take this scripture or the scripture of your choice with you throughout the day.

Spirituali---TEA
10/24/10 In the summer of 2003, I had an idea to begin a “Tea with Thee” devotional time. I would record the teas I chose each day and rate them alongside the spiritual life lessons I gained during my quiet times. In was a documentation of my own little ”Tea Road.” I don’t think I completed my 30-day goal but I did discover things---both about my aromatic beverage of choice and the Lord I worshipped.

Paired with recent notes from a recent ABC sermon, I have 3 things noted. I like my tea---steeped from tea leaves for a “maturi--TEA” flavor---part of that deep flavor comes from the leaves themselves (inherent) and part from my preparation of it---what I do with the tea I am given. That’s the tea test.

Spiritual maturity is a lot like that too. However, the test for spiritual maturity isn’t an IQ test, though “lack of Bible knowledge is no virtue.” The real test is more of a heart test, a spiritual EKG of sorts. (Buddy, 9/26/10) It’s what we do with what we know. It overflows with love to the Lord, to neighbors (others) and to those in the household of faith.

My “cuppa’s” perfect blend is rich in color and taste. Spirituali--TEA also has a depth of color---a color rich in diversity as it reflects the Lord’s love to the world.

Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity! (Psalm 133:1)

HHH

10/21/10 H.H.H. are the initials of a precious 8 yr. old girl from Allen Bible church. 3 weeks ago she was fine 'til she had a bad stomach ache.
Synopsis:
Tweets begin. TESTS. Waiting. MRI. Very rare cancer. Waiting. Bilirubin up. Meds given. Waiting. Meds don''t work. Fewer tweets, more prayers. Prayers for younger brother, Jacob. Surgery for stent to drain fluids. Waiting. Lung collapses. Waiting. Lung improves. Family at hospital day & night. Waiting. Consult with liver transplant team. Waiting. Another MRI needed. MRI postponed. Waiting. MRI completed. Results due in hours. The longest waiting begins.

Recent tweets with prayer requests:

• Healing of her Liver & for Hannah's emotions & spirit to remain positive, calm, upbeat & to know she is loved!
• Bilirubin to come down so they can treat the cancer!
• MRI & Xrays to show improvements not regression!
  
• A liver transplant after determining that the cancer has not spread is the only earthly possibility for Hannah's survival!
  
• Thursday is HUGE in our daughter's life for sure, but AGAIN, our hope is in the Lord & to Glorify God even if they come back & say NO!
  
• Give us Hope Lord! Purify our Hearts Jesus to be more like you!
  
• We believe that you are the Christ & our Savior & your ways are perfect!
  
• Everyone who reads this Tweet, we need your prayers more than ever for our sweet little Hannah!

Please join me throughout the day in praying God's best for Hannah Hasslen.

The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much. (James 5:16)
May the we pray for the Hasslens to "be joyful in hope, patient in affliction and fervent in prayer." (Romans 12:12)

To God be the Glory!