"proximi-TEA" : a Re-Brew

Listen to my voice in the morning, LORD. Each morning I bring my requests to you and wait expectantly. (Psalm 5:3, NLT)

Still pondering those times of proximity to the Lord, I realized that often I am drawn to Him during times of trial. Hard times. Heavy heart times. 

Suffering or sharing in someone else's suffering pulls me to my knees and lifts my head and heart to Him. It's not my favorite way to seek Him but it is one of the surest and swiftest----pain, especially of others, tugs at my heart and in turn I tug at the Lord's heart. 

Physical pain. Emotional pain. Chronic pain. Seemingly hopeless situations. Without God's grace, both they and I can grow weary, lose heart and sink into despair. 

I prefer to enter into His Presence through praise and singing---sadness and sorrow is just too wearying. But God....showed me thru Crickett's H2H lesson on Psalm 66, that the way into the Lord's Presence is the same...whether I come with a heavy heart or a light heart. It's through WORSHIP. Worship starts with praise and thanksgiving, regardless of how one feels. 

"A heavy heart lifts on the wings of praise. " (J. Roberson McQuilkin) 

Dr. McQuilkin speaks our of his own pain as he shared in his book, A Promise Kept, about leaving the presidency of Columbia International University to care for his wife, who was suffering from a physical and mentally debilitating illness----Alzheimer's. He concludes that "in acceptance there is peace."

I sense the darkness and hopelessness in situations of loved ones. I "feel" their pain, but only as a sideliner. How long before relief comes? Does acceptance come first? How do I help? What do I pray? 

Proximi-TEA---a big cuppa is needed---Tea for Two. Shared verses as reminders of the Lord's nearness. Shared prayers. Shared joy from being in His Presence with the same purpose.

Prayer: Oh, Lord may we start with praise for all the treasures you give-----treasures You can give that are hidden in this darkness, this hard dark place. Grant secret riches from your hand as "we" wait on You. Thank You for the life lessons of patience and trust which can be learned as we draw near to Thee.

Thank You, Father God, that You are close, You call us by name, and You keep us hidden in the shadow of Your hand until this great darkness is lifted. Praises for Your grace that can keep us from growing weary and losing heart as you strengthen us by the power of your might that we all might have patience and endurance during this hard time....'til we might joyfully give thanks. May our hearts be lifted on wings of praise as we pray in Jesus' name.

(Isa. 45:3, 49:2 and Colossians 1: 11)

Friday Fatigue----NOT the good kind

6/24/11 I’m up, but not exactly “at ’em.” “Up and at ‘em, ” a rise and shine type phrase from my childhood at 2211. My “ant to” is flagging---I just don’t ‘ant to (want to) do much of anything. My “get up and go,” got up and went and I don’t even feel like looking for it.

I think you get the picture. Add to that piles of “undone” at my house---here a stack, there a stack, everywhere a stack-stack. Retirement stuff---from gifts to files from moving out after 42 years of education, Mommar’s affairs, from funeral wrap-ups to cob-webby momentos from her Somerville place, Daddy’s cards and thank you notes awaiting. Plus suitcases barely unpacked but not stored, refrigerator leftovers screaming for attention and beautiful flowers and plants, from 2 recent funerals, lining the kitchen counter. I tend to hop (more like trudge) from one thing to the next, accomplishing nothing, at least nothing measurable. Overwhelming!

I need to appropriate Colossians 1:11 for myself ASAP (Always Say A Prayer)---and ask the Lord to strengthen me by the power of His might that I might have patience and endurance WITH JOY during this time.

That, and I plan to do something measurable---nothing tends to satisfy me more, with little effort yet with a sense of accomplishment, than sharpening my pencils. Fatigue is never a factor for me when I’m sharpening pencils!

FATIGUE

3/20/11FATIGUE……..in ALL CAPS. I think that must be the label above the wall I just “hit.” Actually I seem to be surrounded by tired, sagging walls. Walls too exhausted and too WEAK to hold me up. There is no apparent way out. No doors labeled ENERGY are appearing.

Fret not, Dots. (Psalm 37:23-24)

Be anxious for nothing....(Philippians 4:6)

Maybe I need to pray Colossians 1:11 for myself as well as others.

May you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy, (ESV)

Big E, little e……..

5/14/10…………it sounds like the first line of a Dr. Seuss book. But it’s not! For us it’s all about antigens, antibodies, anemia, titer (concentration of antibodies), neonatalist and in utero transfusions.
Words foreign to our vocabulary until yesterday. Words that trigger the "fearful unknown."

I know this “trust” dance, I’ve done it before---just with different steps. This time it’s not just my dance---but it involves my children and their spouses (also my children) and grandchildren and that is a harder dance for me to learn.

This will not just be a “me and Thee” dance but more of a circle folk-type dance that will include both families, Diltz and Liles. We’re going to have to interlock arms, bow heads and be open to our “Cuer”---a term for a round dance caller. That’s the way one learns a round dance---just following the steps and the turns that come from the “cuer” ---soft though though his voice may be. It’s a step-by-step learning as the “cuer” creates dance sequences---because there are often no clear directions. The “cuer” gives the lead and new instructions when you’re ready for the next level. The “cuer” knows and therefore can define difficulty levels at which their dancers are dancing.

However, as a believer I have found that, regardless of the difficulty, my “trust” dances follow the same pattern, no matter how intricate and unfamiliar the steps. I just have to focus on the D.A.N.C.E.!
Discovering revelation from God’s word ---Romans 12:12 comes to mind that we all might be “joyful in hope, patient in affliction and fervent in prayer.” “rejoicing in hope, (hoping for the best---that Day’s levels remain at 1.8) faithful in affliction (for Day and baby Liles physically & all of us emotionally) and fervent in prayer” (oh how we covet prayers)
Accepting that these physical difficulties for both Day and the baby are out of our control and accepting God’s peace to cover our emotional pain
Noticing God’s hand in the provision of the early lab findings that deal with immunohematology, as well as availability of great medical facilities and doctors in Dallas area
Celebrating God’s faithfulness with Nathan’s early arrival, Noah’s nasal hemangioma where involution occurred on its own so no surgical interventions needed, Caleb’s 34 week delivery and ICU stay which in no way thwarted his mental or physical abilities and the monthly shots that prevented John Parker’s early arrival---also grateful he didn’t “arrive” in the middle of the parking lot, though he certainly cut it close. Remembering His faithfulness in the past helps me garner confidence for this new dance.

Extending hope to family and to others as we all begin this struggle of not knowing, coupled with continuing assessment of this medical situation

1 Cor 10:13, No test or temptation (trial) that comes your way is beyond the course of what others have had to face. All you need to remember is that God will never let you down; he'll never let you be pushed past your limit; he'll always be there to help you come through it. (The Message)

I am praying that we all will be strengthened by the power of His might so that we will have patience and endurance during this hard time.(Colossians 1:11)

He is already there---ready for this “Big E shuffle” or whatever we dub this dance---

He already knows all those words. He knows the steps we need to take. For it is He who “created my (baby Liles) inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb.” (Psalm 139:13)