2/20/09 Lexiteria Liles Style
Posted late today because both phone and internet have been down---maybe that was God’s hand---setting me apart for meditation.
Brother Buddy is a lexicologist, son Buddy is a wordsmith and lately I (who have similar genes) struggle with finding just the right words ---especially in this “cobweb” brain of mine. Now, I am concerned about words (notice I didn’t put worried or fretting---I know they are no-nos)----words that might come out of my mouth while I’m drug induced for these surgeries. Sitting with my father-in-law at the hospital, after he’s had to have procedures that require more morphine, and hearing the “babble” that comes from his mouth makes me uncomfortable. I certainly have my share of character flaws, but to date, foul language has never been one of them. People who know me well and even the students at school, make fun of my strong language-----
lawzie-beezie, dear gussie, what in the sam hill, tootberries, I suhwanee,
oy vey & a few other Yiddish expressions are about as profane as I get----but what if I lose my manners while under the influence of all those surgery drugs and babble all the “bleep” words I’ve ever heard in my entire life? Remember, my prayer request has been, “Lord don’t let my actions/behavior during this MAC season overshadow (in any way) Your goodness.” How much goodness will people see if my mouth is filled with #@**/!
Okay, let’s talk about meaningful words. Words are important to me, especially from scripture. One of my all time favorite verses is Jeremiah 15:16. Thy words were found and I ate them, and Thy words became for me a joy and the delight of my heart.
Lately I’ve been devouring them---and you now know that’s scriptural. Some have asked what kind of Bible I have? I’m assuming they mean version although there are a variety of study Bibles. For Bible study, I use the New American Standard Version (NASB) for memorizing, much has been done with the King James Version (KJV) ---you know all those Thees & Thous & haths---and for nightly reading Larry uses either a New International Version or more recently the English Standard Version (ESV) which he recently bought at DTS in Dallas to read aloud verses folks have sent to me that day. Those translations flow well when reading.
Compare the versions of Psalm 37:3 Trust in the LORD, and do good; Dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness. (NASB)
Trust in the LORD, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed. (KJV)
Same verse, different version, often gives me a little more insight ---however I’m no Hebrew expert so I ask the Bible Study Fellowship questions: what does it say ?; what does it mean?; and what does this mean to me? This particular verse means to me that I can take a verse of scripture and meditate on it, feed on it, throughout the day---to me, it’s as if when I am trusting in Him, I am “feeding on faithfulness” His faithfulness and His truths as I apply them to my life.
If I want to go for additional commentary I use
http://www.soniclight.com/constable/notes.htm
Dr. Constable is a DTS professor who is a reliable source.
Wow if I have any readers after this didactic entry, I’ll know you are stout of heart----or maybe you too want to truly feed on God’s Word.
Friday, February 20, 2009
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Sherry
2/19/09 In Loving Memory of Sherry Fries Kaplan
Loving & faithful wife, loving & caring mother,
loving & generous grandmother
astute businesswoman,“ spark” of Longreen,
How do you put into words the special relationship that comes from living next door to someone for 32 years----being concise is difficult when trying to encapsulate such a relationship. Those early years were shared with kids and all that encompasses; the middle years included her girls’ bat mitzvahs, weddings and eventually grandchildren. Then the “picking up the slack” phase (mail, garbage, paying each other’s bills was always Jerome’s joke) began as both families began to travel more, in part, because each of us had a child/children who moved out of state. Plus, Sherry loved cruises and Las Vegas.
The latter years were spent on one or the other’s patios, especially the summer following her pancreatic cancer diagnosis. She was amazing---for 2 ½ years during her final season of life, she did all the doctors prescribed and yet worked those treatments around really important “life” events----attending both grandsons’ bar mitzvahs and even taking them to Israel this past December---what a way to spend your last Hanukkah!
Her final weeks we spent in her den sharing memories—and the fellowship that comes when 2 people are on the same side of the cancer struggle. The final days were spent on the phone as she would call to check on me---what a gal!
The final goodbye came standing behind her wheelchair waiting on the EMTs to load her in the ambulance. I was stroking her hair and holding a pillow by her head for comfort as she answered, “Larry and Dotsy” to their question, “who do you see here” ----how grateful I am for that moment of coherence before they took her to the hospital for the final time.
I will continue to pray the prayer for Sherry’s family that she took to Israel for me to be put in the Western Wall/ Wailing Wall (thanks, Jerome)---it’s from the prophet, Isaiah.
Look unto me and be saved, all the ends of the earth;
For I am God and there is no other.
You will be sorely missed, my friend.
Loving & faithful wife, loving & caring mother,
loving & generous grandmother
astute businesswoman,“ spark” of Longreen,
How do you put into words the special relationship that comes from living next door to someone for 32 years----being concise is difficult when trying to encapsulate such a relationship. Those early years were shared with kids and all that encompasses; the middle years included her girls’ bat mitzvahs, weddings and eventually grandchildren. Then the “picking up the slack” phase (mail, garbage, paying each other’s bills was always Jerome’s joke) began as both families began to travel more, in part, because each of us had a child/children who moved out of state. Plus, Sherry loved cruises and Las Vegas.
The latter years were spent on one or the other’s patios, especially the summer following her pancreatic cancer diagnosis. She was amazing---for 2 ½ years during her final season of life, she did all the doctors prescribed and yet worked those treatments around really important “life” events----attending both grandsons’ bar mitzvahs and even taking them to Israel this past December---what a way to spend your last Hanukkah!
Her final weeks we spent in her den sharing memories—and the fellowship that comes when 2 people are on the same side of the cancer struggle. The final days were spent on the phone as she would call to check on me---what a gal!
The final goodbye came standing behind her wheelchair waiting on the EMTs to load her in the ambulance. I was stroking her hair and holding a pillow by her head for comfort as she answered, “Larry and Dotsy” to their question, “who do you see here” ----how grateful I am for that moment of coherence before they took her to the hospital for the final time.
I will continue to pray the prayer for Sherry’s family that she took to Israel for me to be put in the Western Wall/ Wailing Wall (thanks, Jerome)---it’s from the prophet, Isaiah.
Look unto me and be saved, all the ends of the earth;
For I am God and there is no other.
You will be sorely missed, my friend.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
MORNING SONG
2/18/09 Good Morning
It’s a new day and I plan to rejoice and be glad in it. (Psalm 118:24)
Lamentations 3 says it well:
22The LORD'S lovingkindnesses indeed never cease,
For His compassions never fail.
23They are new every morning;
Great is Your faithfulness.
So, to enjoy this new morn, indeed, I’ll have a “cuppa”----Royal Blend, I think. It’s one of my favorite tea blends---it’s a Fortnum and Mason variety and can be tricky to find. My first introduction to it was when visiting the FM London store---and being led in on the first floor by the doorman in the “frock-coat.” After that last trip in 2002, I was able to get it at Leaf & Bean in Park Slope, Brooklyn when visiting son, Josh, but no more---- only found stateside now at SAKS. But I found it!
All of that to say, this “cuppa of the day” is special and a great accompaniment to my time with Him---a time of soul restoration. (Psalm 25:3) Plus, just as the Fortnum Mason brand has ties to royalty, so do I. I am a child/daughter of the King.
But you are A CHOSEN RACE, A ROYAL PRIESTHOOD, A HOLY NATION, A PEOPLE FOR God's OWN POSSESSION, so that you may proclaim the excellencies of Him who has called you out of darkness into His marvelous light; (1 Peter 2:9)
I Peter 2:1-3 says, Putting aside all……long for the pure milk of the word………grow…….if (since is better translation) you have tasted the kindness of the Lord.
As I sip my tea and reflect on this, I realize that in the midst of an upcoming busy day, I will have to intentionally listen for His voice, which is music to my ears. How else will I block out the cacophony of the urgent that whirls around me?? That’s why this beginning time with Him is so important---a time of tuning out all but one sound for awhile---to listen to the sound from the One who speaks truth, learned at His feet and can whisper it in His still small voice or hum it in my ear as we dance throughout this new day.
Then at the end of the day, I hope that I will be able to see my day, as a day offered to Him as an acceptable spiritual sacrifice. (I Peter 2: 5)
(Can you tell my son is preaching from I Peter this month?)
Have a “cuppa” with the King, and enjoy your day---that’s just what I intend to do!
It’s a new day and I plan to rejoice and be glad in it. (Psalm 118:24)
Lamentations 3 says it well:
22The LORD'S lovingkindnesses indeed never cease,
For His compassions never fail.
23They are new every morning;
Great is Your faithfulness.
So, to enjoy this new morn, indeed, I’ll have a “cuppa”----Royal Blend, I think. It’s one of my favorite tea blends---it’s a Fortnum and Mason variety and can be tricky to find. My first introduction to it was when visiting the FM London store---and being led in on the first floor by the doorman in the “frock-coat.” After that last trip in 2002, I was able to get it at Leaf & Bean in Park Slope, Brooklyn when visiting son, Josh, but no more---- only found stateside now at SAKS. But I found it!
All of that to say, this “cuppa of the day” is special and a great accompaniment to my time with Him---a time of soul restoration. (Psalm 25:3) Plus, just as the Fortnum Mason brand has ties to royalty, so do I. I am a child/daughter of the King.
But you are A CHOSEN RACE, A ROYAL PRIESTHOOD, A HOLY NATION, A PEOPLE FOR God's OWN POSSESSION, so that you may proclaim the excellencies of Him who has called you out of darkness into His marvelous light; (1 Peter 2:9)
I Peter 2:1-3 says, Putting aside all……long for the pure milk of the word………grow…….if (since is better translation) you have tasted the kindness of the Lord.
As I sip my tea and reflect on this, I realize that in the midst of an upcoming busy day, I will have to intentionally listen for His voice, which is music to my ears. How else will I block out the cacophony of the urgent that whirls around me?? That’s why this beginning time with Him is so important---a time of tuning out all but one sound for awhile---to listen to the sound from the One who speaks truth, learned at His feet and can whisper it in His still small voice or hum it in my ear as we dance throughout this new day.
Then at the end of the day, I hope that I will be able to see my day, as a day offered to Him as an acceptable spiritual sacrifice. (I Peter 2: 5)
(Can you tell my son is preaching from I Peter this month?)
Have a “cuppa” with the King, and enjoy your day---that’s just what I intend to do!
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
EARS TO HEAR
2/17/09 Ears that Hear
I’m thinking blogging might be very short tonight---it’s been an extremely difficult and emotionally taxing last 48 hours dealing with family issues---poor health and aging can be tough on everyone.
Give ear to my words, O LORD, Consider my groaning. (Psa. 5:1) I don’t how much I verbalized but my body was groaning with the weight of circumstances that truly aren’t even mine---I just care about those involved and feel so helpless. I know God hears—Scripture validates that.
The eyes of the LORD are toward the righteous, And His ears are open to their cry. Psa. 34:15
O LORD, You have heard the desire of the humble; You will strengthen their heart, You will incline Your ear ….Psalm 10: 17
But what about listening----do I have ears to hear---it seems so hard right now.
So here’s the assignment---what does God’s word say about listening/heeding?
BTW, Psalm 34 (which Larry read to me last night) validates not only the truth that God hears but He cares and takes action on our behalf.
17 The righteous cry, and the LORD hears
And delivers them out of all their troubles.
18 The LORD is near to the brokenhearted
And saves those who are crushed in spirit.
19 Many are the afflictions of the righteous,
But the LORD delivers him out of them all.
Okay, I feel better, just tired, so I’m going to bed and leave the homework to the “students.”
Nite, I love you as all the Liles say!
I’m thinking blogging might be very short tonight---it’s been an extremely difficult and emotionally taxing last 48 hours dealing with family issues---poor health and aging can be tough on everyone.
Give ear to my words, O LORD, Consider my groaning. (Psa. 5:1) I don’t how much I verbalized but my body was groaning with the weight of circumstances that truly aren’t even mine---I just care about those involved and feel so helpless. I know God hears—Scripture validates that.
The eyes of the LORD are toward the righteous, And His ears are open to their cry. Psa. 34:15
O LORD, You have heard the desire of the humble; You will strengthen their heart, You will incline Your ear ….Psalm 10: 17
But what about listening----do I have ears to hear---it seems so hard right now.
So here’s the assignment---what does God’s word say about listening/heeding?
BTW, Psalm 34 (which Larry read to me last night) validates not only the truth that God hears but He cares and takes action on our behalf.
17 The righteous cry, and the LORD hears
And delivers them out of all their troubles.
18 The LORD is near to the brokenhearted
And saves those who are crushed in spirit.
19 Many are the afflictions of the righteous,
But the LORD delivers him out of them all.
Okay, I feel better, just tired, so I’m going to bed and leave the homework to the “students.”
Nite, I love you as all the Liles say!
Monday, February 16, 2009
Hearing/Heeding
2/16/09 Meditating on hearing/heeding----
My obsessive self-control (ar) showed itself again on Valentine’s Day, as I felt I could only write in my journals, if I had a red pen-----so I used one-----I wrote----I felt better, and silly, at the same time. A lot of V-Day was spent at the hospital with Grandaddy so I didn’t have lots of time for reading until almost “lights out” time, when I’m usually way past any point of comprehension ability. I read My Utmost for His Highest entry for that day and I’ve reread it every day since.
"What I tell you in darkness, that speak ye in light: and what ye hear in the ear, that preach ye upon the housetops." Matthew 10:27
"At times God puts us through the discipline of darkness to teach us to heed Him. Songbirds are taught to sing in the dark, and we are put into the shadow of God's hand until we learn to hear Him." (need ears to hear, Dotsy) "What I tell you in darkness"---watch where God puts you into darkness, and when you are there keep your mouth shut." (Docs are taking care of that part---sewing it shut for a couple of weeks---maybe I can learn before then and that procedure won’t be needed.)
"Are you in the dark just now in your circumstances, or in your life with God? Then remain quiet. If you open your mouth in the dark, you will talk in the wrong mood: darkness is the time to listen…….but, listen and heed………..hear what God is saying. When you are in the dark, listen, and God will give you a very precious message for someone else when you get into the light."
The teacher in me senses an “Assignment: Ears” coming down the pike. Hard to believe it’s been 42 years since that first teaching job at Richland Elementary as J. Cawthorn’s afternoon kindergarten aide----my main impetus being financial gain ---$50 a month. I wanted to earn “spending money” for my first European tour w/ the Memphis State Art Dept. $$ has always been an area where the Lord has had to be patient with me---slow learner here. But God………Why do you spend money for what is not bread, and your wages for what does not satisfy? Listen carefully to me and eat what is good, and delight yourself in abunDANCE. Incline your ear & come to Me. Listen that you may live; (Isaiah 55: 2-3)
I'm glad that today I backed off of “perfection” and sought a quietude of sorts---that calm, peacefulness that comes from Him---whether in the solitude, that I seem to require great amounts of lately, or in the midst of life’s bustle----that usually can only occur after I’ve had time in the Word----then it’s an overflow of sorts. I plan to mediate on "listen that you may live" ---because with me living doesn't count unless it's done with Him----that's why I equate living/life with dancing----He's always alongside----maybe if I'll listen close enough I'll hear Him humming our song.
My obsessive self-control (ar) showed itself again on Valentine’s Day, as I felt I could only write in my journals, if I had a red pen-----so I used one-----I wrote----I felt better, and silly, at the same time. A lot of V-Day was spent at the hospital with Grandaddy so I didn’t have lots of time for reading until almost “lights out” time, when I’m usually way past any point of comprehension ability. I read My Utmost for His Highest entry for that day and I’ve reread it every day since.
"What I tell you in darkness, that speak ye in light: and what ye hear in the ear, that preach ye upon the housetops." Matthew 10:27
"At times God puts us through the discipline of darkness to teach us to heed Him. Songbirds are taught to sing in the dark, and we are put into the shadow of God's hand until we learn to hear Him." (need ears to hear, Dotsy) "What I tell you in darkness"---watch where God puts you into darkness, and when you are there keep your mouth shut." (Docs are taking care of that part---sewing it shut for a couple of weeks---maybe I can learn before then and that procedure won’t be needed.)
"Are you in the dark just now in your circumstances, or in your life with God? Then remain quiet. If you open your mouth in the dark, you will talk in the wrong mood: darkness is the time to listen…….but, listen and heed………..hear what God is saying. When you are in the dark, listen, and God will give you a very precious message for someone else when you get into the light."
The teacher in me senses an “Assignment: Ears” coming down the pike. Hard to believe it’s been 42 years since that first teaching job at Richland Elementary as J. Cawthorn’s afternoon kindergarten aide----my main impetus being financial gain ---$50 a month. I wanted to earn “spending money” for my first European tour w/ the Memphis State Art Dept. $$ has always been an area where the Lord has had to be patient with me---slow learner here. But God………Why do you spend money for what is not bread, and your wages for what does not satisfy? Listen carefully to me and eat what is good, and delight yourself in abunDANCE. Incline your ear & come to Me. Listen that you may live; (Isaiah 55: 2-3)
I'm glad that today I backed off of “perfection” and sought a quietude of sorts---that calm, peacefulness that comes from Him---whether in the solitude, that I seem to require great amounts of lately, or in the midst of life’s bustle----that usually can only occur after I’ve had time in the Word----then it’s an overflow of sorts. I plan to mediate on "listen that you may live" ---because with me living doesn't count unless it's done with Him----that's why I equate living/life with dancing----He's always alongside----maybe if I'll listen close enough I'll hear Him humming our song.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
IN Memory
2/15/09
In Loving Memory of Susan Robins Purifoy 1946-2009
---a life well lived---
Enough said. Her life said it all---
Jesus Christ was her Wisdom, her True Word, her Treasure and her Lord.
In Loving Memory of Susan Robins Purifoy 1946-2009
---a life well lived---
Enough said. Her life said it all---
Jesus Christ was her Wisdom, her True Word, her Treasure and her Lord.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Happy Valentine’s Day
2/14/09 Love is in the air---or it should be---with every breath you take!
Have you shown God’s love to someone today?! Remember there’s a world of hurting people---everyone has a burden or some kind of “baggage,” so let’s be sensitive and extend a “hand” of grace and love to family, friends and beyond. I’m getting a little “preachy” here, aren’t I?? It’s because my experience with my rare cancer, aka Big MAC, has clearly shown me the difference the depth of His love for me and the love from others has made in my life.
Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends. (John 15:13)
How grateful I am to have a Savior who laid down His life for me. Today, may I lay down my self-centeredness---dying to “self “ in every way, that I might love others better.
Friday, February 13, 2009
Encouragement
2/13/09 Encouragement
Years ago, I received a birthday card from dear friend, Ellen----I was born in September on a Friday the 13th, so I consider all Friday the 13ths as days of blessing and am so grateful for all the ones the Lord has given me. The card said, “In this world, there are “dancers” and there are critics. Happy Birthday to one on the “Dancers.” That card was such an encouragement to me, that to this day, I remember it---I eventually found that same card at Hallmark---but only 2 of them--- and thus was able to pass along that same encouragement to two friends whose celebration of life and the Lord, had been, & continues to be, such an inspiration to me ---even though we live miles apart and I see them just every few years---and they don't even know each other.
You see a critical spirit comes far too easily for me, so I want to choose each day to encourage rather than criticize----or hold others to my expectations----I choose today to let go of the list of responsibilities I want to put on others and choose instead to respond in relational love.
Love is about relationship. I choose today to live and dance......
Years ago, I received a birthday card from dear friend, Ellen----I was born in September on a Friday the 13th, so I consider all Friday the 13ths as days of blessing and am so grateful for all the ones the Lord has given me. The card said, “In this world, there are “dancers” and there are critics. Happy Birthday to one on the “Dancers.” That card was such an encouragement to me, that to this day, I remember it---I eventually found that same card at Hallmark---but only 2 of them--- and thus was able to pass along that same encouragement to two friends whose celebration of life and the Lord, had been, & continues to be, such an inspiration to me ---even though we live miles apart and I see them just every few years---and they don't even know each other.
You see a critical spirit comes far too easily for me, so I want to choose each day to encourage rather than criticize----or hold others to my expectations----I choose today to let go of the list of responsibilities I want to put on others and choose instead to respond in relational love.
Love is about relationship. I choose today to live and dance......
......in a time of glorious expectancy in relationships (not a legalistic expectation)---an expectancy of cherishing and encouraging----I want family and friends to know how much I love them and all too often I’m not very good at showing that.
How about you? Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day----show your love to those God has placed in your life---even those who grate on your nerves at time---God can allow His love to flow through you to others.
Habakkuk (one of those books near the back of the Old Testament) shows that when the prophet set himself to listen to what the Lord had to say to him, he heard not about himself but about others----“Write down this revelation and make it plain to others.”
Today, prepare to do something for others on V-Day 2009---something of significance to “herald” your love for them. Maybe put your dancing shoes on, and give them (or him/her) a whirl around the room and make your love plain to them. Celebrate life and each other.
How about you? Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day----show your love to those God has placed in your life---even those who grate on your nerves at time---God can allow His love to flow through you to others.
Habakkuk (one of those books near the back of the Old Testament) shows that when the prophet set himself to listen to what the Lord had to say to him, he heard not about himself but about others----“Write down this revelation and make it plain to others.”
Today, prepare to do something for others on V-Day 2009---something of significance to “herald” your love for them. Maybe put your dancing shoes on, and give them (or him/her) a whirl around the room and make your love plain to them. Celebrate life and each other.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
The Eyes are Back
2/12/09
My eyes are continually toward the Lord, for He will pluck my feet out of the net. (Psa. 25:15)
Confession: my humanity got all tangled up in my net this morning. I was tripping all over the place in my net of “worries for others.” Why? ….because I had my eyes on the problems of others and set about “fixing them” instead of fixing my eyes on Him. (Heb. 12:2) So-o-o me, and so-o-o wrong---it became a stress/strain rather than an overflow of privilege/love---that’s what happens when I start moving in my own strength. My priorities got “skewed.” I was stewing in my own juices---and that’s not a pretty sight! Bonhoffer wrote, “From the moment we awake until we fall asleep, we must relinquish our loved ones wholly and unreservedly to God and leave them in His hands, transforming our anxiety for them into prayers on their behalf.”
This new “worry storm” kept me awake throughout the night----wide-awake eyes are not fun in the wee hours. I should have given it to the One who “neither slumbers nor sleeps.” (Psa. 121:4) He had already taken care of many of my worries, I just didn’t know it yet.
In His faithfulness He gave me a new morning and allowed my eyes to see, not only the moon high in the sky, when I went out for the paper, but then minutes later, He provided a glorious sunrise. What a vantage point I had---just sitting at the breakfast table with a cup of Bewley’s Irish breakfast tea, in hand, gazing on God’s handiwork.
Confession #2: I wish I could say that the sense of God’s presence was a natural overflow for the rest of the day---like a warm bath of love ---the kind you just want to linger in… but…it was a struggle that I had to deal with for most of the day. I had to keep choosing the right thoughts---sometimes it took me a long time to do that---so many thoughts had to be taken captive, but God……………He was faithful when I was not. He sent a friend to walk with me---what a great de-stressor that can be! I actually made it to a financial advisor with the right papers and she gave me a warm loaf of the best ever almond poppy seed cake, the lock box fiasco was solved, my eye exam was painless, and my car keys were found, not by someone at the hospital parking lot, as I had feared, but in the trunk of my car--- by my husband (who has had to walk that path with me several times before---probably more than he can count) He’s so good at keeping up with me and my things.
Ending the day with friends, I was able to look out into the night sky and see the stars, brilliant with light against that dark backdrop ---even the little dipper. I was able to praise Him for all that He had allowed me to see of creation today. He counts the number of the stars. He gives names to all of them. (Psalm 147:4)
My eyes were able to take in all this that the Lord had created. (Gen. 1:16) And my heart was able to pray what SW once said, “May I never forget in the dark, (darkness of this MAC/ cancer) what I have learned in the light.”
Answered prayer: Thomas’ ”sweet Susan” is resting in the arms of her Lord tonight.
My eyes are continually toward the Lord, for He will pluck my feet out of the net. (Psa. 25:15)
Confession: my humanity got all tangled up in my net this morning. I was tripping all over the place in my net of “worries for others.” Why? ….because I had my eyes on the problems of others and set about “fixing them” instead of fixing my eyes on Him. (Heb. 12:2) So-o-o me, and so-o-o wrong---it became a stress/strain rather than an overflow of privilege/love---that’s what happens when I start moving in my own strength. My priorities got “skewed.” I was stewing in my own juices---and that’s not a pretty sight! Bonhoffer wrote, “From the moment we awake until we fall asleep, we must relinquish our loved ones wholly and unreservedly to God and leave them in His hands, transforming our anxiety for them into prayers on their behalf.”
This new “worry storm” kept me awake throughout the night----wide-awake eyes are not fun in the wee hours. I should have given it to the One who “neither slumbers nor sleeps.” (Psa. 121:4) He had already taken care of many of my worries, I just didn’t know it yet.
In His faithfulness He gave me a new morning and allowed my eyes to see, not only the moon high in the sky, when I went out for the paper, but then minutes later, He provided a glorious sunrise. What a vantage point I had---just sitting at the breakfast table with a cup of Bewley’s Irish breakfast tea, in hand, gazing on God’s handiwork.
Confession #2: I wish I could say that the sense of God’s presence was a natural overflow for the rest of the day---like a warm bath of love ---the kind you just want to linger in… but…it was a struggle that I had to deal with for most of the day. I had to keep choosing the right thoughts---sometimes it took me a long time to do that---so many thoughts had to be taken captive, but God……………He was faithful when I was not. He sent a friend to walk with me---what a great de-stressor that can be! I actually made it to a financial advisor with the right papers and she gave me a warm loaf of the best ever almond poppy seed cake, the lock box fiasco was solved, my eye exam was painless, and my car keys were found, not by someone at the hospital parking lot, as I had feared, but in the trunk of my car--- by my husband (who has had to walk that path with me several times before---probably more than he can count) He’s so good at keeping up with me and my things.
Ending the day with friends, I was able to look out into the night sky and see the stars, brilliant with light against that dark backdrop ---even the little dipper. I was able to praise Him for all that He had allowed me to see of creation today. He counts the number of the stars. He gives names to all of them. (Psalm 147:4)
My eyes were able to take in all this that the Lord had created. (Gen. 1:16) And my heart was able to pray what SW once said, “May I never forget in the dark, (darkness of this MAC/ cancer) what I have learned in the light.”
Answered prayer: Thomas’ ”sweet Susan” is resting in the arms of her Lord tonight.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Dotsy's Dallas Team
2/11/09 D D T (Dotsy’s Dallas Team)---an answer to prayer
FYI--many have asked to pray for my team by name, so here’s the Baylor Medical Team:
Dr. Richard Ha, Craniofacial Surgeon
Dr. Lance Oxford, ENT- (Head/Neck surgery)
Dr. Frank Saporito, mohs surgeon
Dr. Clay Cockerell, dermatopathology
I will leave for “Big D” 3 weeks from today---probably flying down for pre-op procedures. Dr. Ha’s is already scheduled for March 5 and his office suggested that I schedule the others around it. Larry will drive down 2 days later and we will stay in Texas until the surgeries begin. We hope to sneak off for a few days---just the 2 of us. The first surgery is the mohs surgery and it is scheduled for all day, Monday, March 16. Depending on the outcome of this series of excisions of the tumor, (during which I’m awake), the next surgery, which will be the basic foundation laying, by the reconstruction team, will be on Tuesday, March 17. Hospitalization of 4-5 days will follow this surgery. Then, I think---nothing definite in any of this---all will depend on extensiveness of MAC---I will stay in Dallas for a follow-up surgery ---in a week or two---lots of unknowns---other surgeries to follow as needed and I have no idea of the time frame between each.
Prayer requests
For an early time slot to open for surgery on 3/17---scheduled at this time for 12:30---Ha & Oxford need to be wide-eyed and bushytailed
Clear margins--- let’s not second guess MAC here---good eyes for the pathologist
Speaking of eyes, again, I got some great insight from folks—several quoting from praise choruses & hymns---music truly speaks to the heart and helps us remember. Worship leaders and choir members---what a ministry you have.
Another eye-opening thought on eyes came from my MAC sojourner, Michele. What a way this gal has with words!! She used my eyes to address my fear---
My first response when I read your words was, "But if your eyes speak loudly enough, everything else will be muted." …………..I've never seen you, but something tells me that that will be true of you. If the eyes are truly a window to the soul--and I believe they are--the transformations to your face will not alter how people perceive you, because your eyes...I'm sure of it...are animated prisms through which love and faith and pleasure and grace and serenity shine. No amount of surgery can alter that.
I think after this roller coaster day ---I’m not talking ‘bout the rickety old fairgrounds Pippin here---it’s been more of the King’s Island Firehawk variety---I’ll close my eyes with this playing in my head, “Turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face. And the things of this world will grow strangely dim in the light of his glory and grace.”
FYI--many have asked to pray for my team by name, so here’s the Baylor Medical Team:
Dr. Richard Ha, Craniofacial Surgeon
Dr. Lance Oxford, ENT- (Head/Neck surgery)
Dr. Frank Saporito, mohs surgeon
Dr. Clay Cockerell, dermatopathology
I will leave for “Big D” 3 weeks from today---probably flying down for pre-op procedures. Dr. Ha’s is already scheduled for March 5 and his office suggested that I schedule the others around it. Larry will drive down 2 days later and we will stay in Texas until the surgeries begin. We hope to sneak off for a few days---just the 2 of us. The first surgery is the mohs surgery and it is scheduled for all day, Monday, March 16. Depending on the outcome of this series of excisions of the tumor, (during which I’m awake), the next surgery, which will be the basic foundation laying, by the reconstruction team, will be on Tuesday, March 17. Hospitalization of 4-5 days will follow this surgery. Then, I think---nothing definite in any of this---all will depend on extensiveness of MAC---I will stay in Dallas for a follow-up surgery ---in a week or two---lots of unknowns---other surgeries to follow as needed and I have no idea of the time frame between each.
Prayer requests
For an early time slot to open for surgery on 3/17---scheduled at this time for 12:30---Ha & Oxford need to be wide-eyed and bushytailed
Clear margins--- let’s not second guess MAC here---good eyes for the pathologist
Speaking of eyes, again, I got some great insight from folks—several quoting from praise choruses & hymns---music truly speaks to the heart and helps us remember. Worship leaders and choir members---what a ministry you have.
Another eye-opening thought on eyes came from my MAC sojourner, Michele. What a way this gal has with words!! She used my eyes to address my fear---
My first response when I read your words was, "But if your eyes speak loudly enough, everything else will be muted." …………..I've never seen you, but something tells me that that will be true of you. If the eyes are truly a window to the soul--and I believe they are--the transformations to your face will not alter how people perceive you, because your eyes...I'm sure of it...are animated prisms through which love and faith and pleasure and grace and serenity shine. No amount of surgery can alter that.
I think after this roller coaster day ---I’m not talking ‘bout the rickety old fairgrounds Pippin here---it’s been more of the King’s Island Firehawk variety---I’ll close my eyes with this playing in my head, “Turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face. And the things of this world will grow strangely dim in the light of his glory and grace.”
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