Sleep Button

4/27/10 Up early yesterday----"3 something" is even early for me. Bleary eyed. I felt like I was looking through wavy water as I typed. Under the “”apple” on my computer is a sleep button. When I scroll down and click on it, the screen "black out" is instantaneous. It’s there as a power saver---putting the computer into hibernation mode.

I want such a button in my life. I want to be just "one click" away from the comfort of sleep. No tossing. No turning. No anxious thoughts whirring in my head. No need to “pop” a Benadryl, which the docs say isn’t good for dementia avoidance. No struggling to recall verses that seem to rev up instead of calming. Sometimes I just want to sleep.

Dozed some but eventually got up a little after 4 and carried my fatigue with me to work. I just put one foot in front of the other. Not the way I like to spend my day but I did make it through. I’m not the only one, at this age who can struggle with insomnia. Certainly late night/early morning sleep disturbances are not unique to me either. Sleep deprivations from work stress compounded by an “early” school opening is often the topic of our “lunch bunch” conversation.

Prayed for strength as I left work to go read to a friend and to give her hubby a little break. Then boom! I rear-ended an SUV at Poplar and Kirby Parkway. I assumed all cars were moving but obviously the one in front of me was not. Or maybe she did and then stopped. I don’t know. I just know it was my fault and I was grateful the other driver wasn’t hurt. Some days are like that even in Australia as Alexander said during his “terrible, horrible, no good very bad day!"

Finally arriving at home, thanks to a friend passing by and calling police, a tow truck arriving for my car, a somewhat depleted bank account, and a nice Germantown policeman giving me a ride, I really desired that hibernation mode. I wanted to be able to “black out” the wreck, the guilt, and the questions of “what were the life lessons in this” that were whirring in my head.
But God……in reading last night’s God’s Calling, here’s what jumped off the page.

“Have no fear….rest before Me until you are joyful and strong again…. Deal in the same way with all tired feelings. I was weary too, when on earth, and I separated Myself … and sat and rested…. When Paul said, "I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me," he did not mean that he was to do all things and then rely on Me to find strength. He meant that for all I told him to do he could rely on My supplying the strength. My Work in the world has been hindered by work, work, work. Many a tireless nervous body has driven a spirit. The spirit should be the master always, and just simply and naturally use the body as need should arise. Rest in Me.”

Maybe He’s giving me permission to click the sleep button and take time-out for a little hibernation----to rest in Him and be thankful.